July 30, 2006

>> A Waste of Oxygen

[ Fools ]

Hfrog writes...

"I work for a state government as a clerk in a records department. My responsibilities involve copying requested records, filing incoming records, stuff like that. I have a great supervisor snf the work is interesting. Unfortunately since we are going paperless my job is being phased out and so I am going elsewhere.

Untill a couple of weeks ago I had the co-worker from hell. She was consistantly late, usually about 10 minutes or so but would occasionally be and hour or more. My supervisor changed her shift at her request so she would be on time. She was still late.

She did virtually no work. In 4 months she might complete around 1-2 weeks worth of work (based on how much I would have completed in that amount of time). She complained to our supervisor when I gave her something to do. My supervisor's boss would have kittens when we would fall behind, but who would she yell about? No .. not the person not doing their work, but me the person busting their ass to get this stuff done.

She spent all day on the phone. She read personal e-mail, watched streaming video online, surfed, and did all sorts of things on her computer she was not supposed to do.

Let me state for the record I am not a supervisor. I was not this individual's supervisor, but due to her lack of motivation or whatever (and since my sup covered 3 different departments and his office is across the building) I had to keep up with what she was working on, make sure she had stuff do. I did not have to make sure she did it, just keep track of it. All of which added to my workload.

My boss has spent the last year and a half (I kid you not) trying to fire this waste of oxygen. However since our employer is paranoid about being sued you have to bend over backwards to get rid of someone. Finally after a year a half he finally got her fired. But was she gone yet??? NO, of course not. She has to get a certified letter from the commisioner first advising her that she has been fired. So, on her "last day at work" my supervisor had to call her into his office and explain this to her and that she should still come in the next day.

SCREAM!

Anyway, a week and a half later she has some sort of personal problem and does not come to work for over a week. She does not call either. JOY! Job Abandonment! No more slug. She finally calls my supervisor and leaves a message asking him if he wants her to come to work?!?

He never called her back. She came in 2 days ago to pick up her last check and her personal stuff."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 29, 2006

>> No, I won't break the law for you.....

[ Fools ]

Miss Misery writes...

"This happened a long time ago but it still makes my jaw drop every time I think about it.

Around 1994 or so, I was slaving away in a fast food place. Hardly glamorous, but it was a job. On one particular day we had two people call in sick. And *nobody else* would come in, so we had to work the lunch crowd with a whopping four people. It was pure hell, but somehow we made it.

After the lunch crowd diminished and we were cleaning up the wreckage, one of our less-than-reliable teenage employees "Mike" (name changed to protect the guilty) comes in with a bunch of his scuzzy friends (the kind who think underage drinking and smoking are *so coooollll*). Now this same kid wouldn't help us when we really needed it, and now he's stopping by with his friends. Alrighty, bad judgement, but nothing that can't be overlooked, right?

Now here's the kicker: "Mike" wanted me or the Shift Leader (we were over 21) to go get him and the rest his underage friends some beer!!! This little maggot honestly expected us to just drop what we were doing and break the law for him. Said Shift Leader told "Mike" he could either clock in and help or get his sorry ass out.

"Mike" didn't last much longer."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 28, 2006

>> Office Party from Hell

[ Rant ]

Robert writes...

"We had our company party this evening...

Every holiday season, our tiny ad agency holds an annual party for the 4 employees, 3 full-time freelancers who've worked there for years, and all of our clients and a few vendors. The party this year was at a very fancy 5-star restaurant--the kind where the entree is 1/10th the size of the plate. OK, nice party, about 40 people all dressed up, and the boss/owner of the agency starts making glorious comments about how wonderful it's been to work with such a great staff of people, blah, blah. Endless raves about the clients and how good it is to be in business for five years, blah, blah.

Then she proceeds to mention each of the few employees by name and rambles on about each person's remarkable contributions to the company, their great person traits, etc. She goes through a list--of 7 people, and mentions everyone except me. Now I've been freelancing with her in a full-time capacity with the other 2 freelancers for 8 years. You'd think she'd remember to mention me! Should I mention to my boss the next day how upset/hurt I was not to have been mentioned alongside my co-workers?"

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 27, 2006

>> Wicked witch of the middle east

[ Rant ]

electraegg writes...

"I just graduated from college this past May. I was working for a bathroom furnishing's company for about three months when I realized that I really cannot take sales anymore. I go out, find another job as production assistant in an apparel company. I had bad feelings about my interviewer and knew that she was a total complete crazy bitch. But what do I do? I take the job thinking, "oh this will be wonderful experience and could really jumpstart my career in production!"

In the beginning everything was going okay, the girl who was leaving was training me and she really had her shit down. By the time she left though...that's when things started getting crazy.

First, my boss had fired this girl who bought the trims/buttons and whatnots. This girl went to Korea to her sister's wedding and got stuck due to visa problems etc....she was in korea for three weeks (she was only suppose to be there for one) because of this problem and after 3 years of service...my boss straight up fired her. She came back to the US three days after getting fired.

So who gets stuck buying all the trims/buttons/lining/fabric? ME! Of course, my boss decided not to tell me that because you know...why would she? Now the pressure's on. Everyday is a new issue with her. "WHy is everything late? The factories don't want to work with us anymore, when are you buying this button, that trim and blah blah blah."

My primary position was to only by the main fabric for the garment. Not the 249842574583 other things that come with it. I have never worked in a job like this before and since my boss had led me on about getting another girl to buy trim etc I waited (also because she TOLD ME TO WAIT).

Anyway, everyday is another screaminig match with her (of course, I don't scream back so it's just her own screaming match). But today was the topping on the ice cream. THere wasn't even an issue! It was something taht can be resolved with one sentence. My boss reads my emails (she reads everyone's every morning) and what does she say to me? "ARE YOU A LITTLE DYSLEXIC OR SOMETHING?! Why are you writing to THEM about THIS???" I was SO angry! You really shouldn't call your employees names. I have a pretty high tolerence with difficult people but this was it. Of course, the rest of the day she was kissing my ass and being nice to me for no reason. Maybe she realizes that that was completely out of hand. I can't wait to give her my one day notice."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 26, 2006

>> Glad to be gone ...

[ Boss ]

BOHICA writes...

"I used to work for a small government agency with a law enforcement/counterterrorism mission. You would think an agency with a mission that important, particularly in the wake of 9/11, would be staffed with professional employees, right? Wrong! Here are a few of the more startling examples I saw in my time there:

(1) "Sybil" (so named because her radical mood swings made it seem like she had multiple personalities)

At one point, supervisors in my agency were limited to a paygrade of GS-13. When two higher-paying GS-14 slots were finally authorized, two male supervisors, both of whom were very competent and had been waiting for GS-14 jobs for years, competed for these slots and got promoted. Sybil then repeatedly pointed out to anyone who would listen, including managers several levels above her, how "suspicious" it was that two men got promoted to the only two GS-14 slots. Almost overnight, another GS-14 slot was magically authorized with a job description identical to Sybil's (and only Sybil's) and she was automatically promoted WITHOUT having to compete.

A couple of years after getting her promotion, I ended up briefly working for Sybil. I had made the decision to leave the agency for a new job, and Sybil called me up to her office to give me the pep talk trying to convince me to stay. As we talked, her i-Pod, hooked up to her computer speakers, blared the unedited version of Ice Cube's "It Was a Good Day." For those unfamiliar with this rap, it contains fairly graphic descriptions of drive-by shootings and Cube's sexual activity. This in a government office building, during a professional meeting! When I asked about it in disbelief, she shrugged it off saying it was her "running mix" and that she had "eclectic tastes in music." Oh, and did I mention the sensitivity of the computers we worked on meant no i-Pods in the office in the first place?

(2) "Special K"

She started in our office right after 9/11, a bug-eyed woman with the world's worst social skills. She would come by my cubicle and ask for my advice on a project (I had been around a couple of years and was the "old man" of the worker bees), but when I was finished she would then point-by-point explain why she was going to disregard my advice and do it her own way. Special K also had a horrible habit of mangling acronyms, making us wonder if she was stupid; only later did we learn she was DYSLEXIC (this for a job that was 95% reading and writing reports) and hadn't told us because she wanted to "prove herself."

But the kicker came one day during a meeting when all of us were recapping what we were working on. She mentioned reading something about a terrorist group that directly contradicted everything known about them to date. Turns out she was right, but my friend "T" and I both questioned her about the content of the report since we hadn't read it ourselves. Rather than calmly retrieve it and show us we were wrong, she stormed back to her cube, snatched up the report, and returned to T's cube and started SHOVING IT IN HIS FACE, yelling "Read it! Read it!" over and over! The worst part? Even after this incident we allowed her to resign rather than fire her, all because one of our supervisors made an inappropriate comment in her presence a few days later and she threatened a sexual harassment suit if we fired her. So she resigned with no black mark on her record and she actually works for another intelligence agency now ... man, I pity her new co-workers.

And finally, to prove I'm not just ranting about female co-workers ...

(3) "The Old Salt" (TOS)

When I first started with my agency, I was assigned to work under this fool. We were both graduates of the same military service academy (albeit 20 or so years apart), and since most grads I knew were pretty smart, squared away people, I had hoped for the same from TOS. Unfortunately, this fool had two major strikes against him: first, he knew NOTHING about our area of expertise more current than 1987, and two, he could not SHUT UP! I could tell literally dozens of TOS stories (for example, he was the boss who made the inappropriate comment around Special K that kept her from being fired), but here is my favorite:

* Not long after the attack on the destroyer USS COLE, we got a call about a possible swimmer in the water near an aircraft carrier down in Norfolk, Virginia. This was pretty concerning given the recent attack, so my assistant and I were feverishly working the phones trying to get more info on the incident. In the middle of all this hubbub, TOS strolls up and says to me, kind of off-handedly, "You know who it could be? Chessy the Manatee."

In total shock, I turned around and asked, who?

According to TOS, "Chessy" was a manatee (sea cow) that made an annual migration from the waters around Florida up to the Chesapeake Bay (hence the name 'Chessy') and back. TOS claimed that researchers had placed a radio tag on Chessy so they could track him/her/it during the trip.

Unsure of how to respond, TOS launched into one of his many random and pointless taskings and told me that he wanted me to call the Florida Department of Fish and Game and find out Chessy's current location. Here I was, a young, idealistic, highly trained (4 years of training!) intelligence officer, there might be an enemy diver at that very moment planting a bomb on an aircraft carrier, and this yahoo wants me to call Game Warden Bubba down in Florida and find out the current location of a morbidly obese sea mammal so stupid several are killed each year by speedboats?! Are you f-ing kidding me?!

So I blew him off. This was not a big risk with TOS as he would often give taskings and then promptly forget about them, meaning you could usually blow him off with impunity. But at that point I'd never actually been caught doing so Â…

Thus imagine my surprise when about an hour later, with my assistant and I still intensely working the issue, when TOS wanders back to our work area, sneaks up behind me, and asks, 'So, what about Chessy?'

I was caught completely flat-footed. Unwilling to admit I hadn't actually done his stupid tasker, I fumbled for something to say. To this day, I'm not sure where this came from, but I quickly replied, 'Chessy is Â… DEAD.'

TOS actually looked kind of sad for a moment, and I thought I might have actually gotten away with it. Then he asked the dreaded follow-up question: 'How did he die?'

Again, from out of nowhere I replied, 'Ummm Â… hit by a trawler?'

TOS then hung his head for a moment, clucked his tongue, muttered 'How sad,' and wandered away. My assistant waited until TOS was out of earshot and then laughed so hard he fell out of his chair Â…

The final insult? After the Special K incident, TOS was exiled from my old agency to another agency. Guess where I'm working now? :("

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 25, 2006

>> Please Don't Sleep in the Bathtub While at Work

[ Fools ]

Why Do Most Temp Workers Suck? writes...

"I currently temp for a law firm while trying to find a "real" job (since I sworn in as an attorney a few weeks ago). Since there was no more room at the firm, they've rented a one bedroom apartment for our portion of the office. Kinda weird, but eh.

So when I started this job there were a total of 6 of us. 3 rapidly quit (the job is henious and pays nothing). One spent his days - not kidding - SLEEPING IN THE BATHTUB AT WORK. For about two hours. When there is only one bathroom and the other two temps are banging on the door begging him to get out so they can use it.

Surprisingly (NOT), he was fired a few weeks later for failing the bar exam. Ah, well. Then the supervisor had the gall to ask the two of us left why we hadn't told him sooner that 1) the guy was an idiot 2) who slept in bathrooms at work and 3) tended to steal office supplies. So that was fun.

Then they hired 6 more people and gave the other temp and I a "promotion." We got to do extra work - training and supervising the new people - with no extra pay!!! And the best thing was that while we had no say in who they were, we got to see both their resumes and their rates. Well, gee whiz. The new folks were making over twice what we made. We asked for a raise - I quit, but I need the money. In the end we both got raises. The problem? My co-worker got $5 less an hour after the raise than I did, and I'm still paid less then the people I supervise!

We keep talking about our desperate need to quit. Maybe someday soon..."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 24, 2006

>> Torturing me slowly

[ Rant ]

Clenched Jaws writes...

"I am working at this company along with my co-worker as interns. Every day we spend our office ours in the same office and barely anyone ever checks up on us since our only supervisor travels so much. Now my co-worker has several annoying things that are slowly but surely driving me crazy.

1) He browses the internet for sites that either relate to games and music all day. This wouldn't be annoying at all since we barely get assigned to do anything. However, he insists that I share in his current song or gaming audio effects even though he carries headphones with him all the time. So all day I would be hearing either some annoying piece of music or the electronic cues of an online game.

2) He's a great drummer. Why is that annoying you ask? Well it's not so much his drumming ability than it's constant... banging and rhythmic thumping on any piece of furniture and office accessory. When he's waiting for point 1) above to load or in sessions in between, he would tap with his fingers, hands, shoes, on the office floor, chair, table, his laptop. This goes on ALL THE TIME!!!!

3) This is the one that REALLY drives me up the wall and he's doing it RIGHT NOW as I type this. He's humming some out-of-tune melody from who knows what song. AND he chooses to hum it in an octave that is too high to be suitable for his voice. It's always MMmmmMMMmmMMM *gasp for air* MmmMMMMmmmMmm *gasp* mMMmMMMmmMMMMmmm over and over and over.

This is slowly killing me. I know that these things might not have an immediate effect but I find that the consistency of the torture as an effect equal to that of the Chinese water torture (where they lock someone in a really small room, possibly only fit for one person to stand, in pure darkness and silence, and a drop of water drips onto him/her every so often... drip...drip...drip)."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 23, 2006

>> Lazy!

[ Fools ]

Anonymous writes...

"We have someone in our office (I'll call her Ellie) who'll do just about anything to get out of work, regardless of how morally deficient it might be.

Professionally, Ellie's been called into The Bosses' office for just about every charge you can imagine: poor time-keeping, extra long lunches, leaving early without completing the hours required of her, poor performance, excessive sick leave, etc. She won't come into work if she a) is hung-over, b) has overslept or c) just can't be bothered, and phones in with various lame excuses. We work in a lenient and laid back office, so to be called in by our mild mannered director takes quite some doing. Ellie was outraged by her poor appraisal this year and claimed that every bad mark against her was 'someone else's fault'. Naturally!

Ellie sunk to an all-time low in work-avoidance in July. Her friend (let's call her Franny) called Ellie in a state of distress because a male friend of Franny's had been reported missing after the London tube bombings. It turned out that the poor man had actually been killed in one of the explosions. As soon as Ellie found this out, she turned on the "tears-&-quivering-lip" act and raced into our director's office to explain that "a friend" of hers had perished in the attack and she needed the afternoon off. When asked by a colleague how well she knew the bomb victim, Ellie looked really panicky for a split-second and suddenly burst into floods of tears and ran out of the office (a great way to avoid answering those pesky tricky questions).

A few minutes after Ellie had done a runner, the same person asked another colleague how well Ellie knew the victim. Ellie happened to be returning from her sob session at that precise moment (literally RIGHT past the person who was asking the question) and totally ignored the question. Anybody else would've been very indignant about having their integrity questioned but, oddly, not Ellie. She chose to avoid answernig any questions about her relationship with her friend's friend. A day or two later, another colleague made a callous joke about terrorists and Ellie blew up, chastising him for his insensitivity. About a week later (and in front of our entire office, for maximum effect) she sobbed inconsolably as a 2-minute silence was held for the bomb victims. However she was in the pub two hours later, cracking jokes about the bomb with a pint in her hand. As it turns out, she'd never met or spoken to the bomb victim in her entire life and used his death as an excuse to get out of work.

Life's sweet when you're a grifter...

When challenged by the bosses about how she blatantly spends all day surfing the internet and emailing her buddies, Ellie hotly denies it and has openly stated that if she's ever accused by the company of poor performance in ANY respect, she won't hesitate in claiming sexual discrimination because she happens to be gay. The truth is, she's not once experienced problems from anyone here because of her sexuality.

Unbelievable."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 22, 2006

>> I cant understand my boss!!!!

[ Work ]

Magdalen writes...

"I am 25 years old and have been working full time for about 9 years now. Upto now I have been lucky enough to have bosses who have been very laid back and let me get on with my work without too much interference. I was so used to working in a carefree environment where I am left to my own devices that when I started my new job as a Clinical Safety Specialist in a small pharmaceutical company a few months ago, I was shocked to see the level of office politics that went on because of a few power crazy control freak managers, including my own boss.

When I first started, she was really nice, allowed me to take holidays at short notice and when I came in ill to work one day, she even insisted that I take the rest of the day off. Fast forward to last month and I was feeling so sick that I could barely stand, I asked to go home an hour early but my boss insisted that I take the rest of the afternoon off. The next day I was still too ill to get out of bed so my dad (the angel!!) said he would ring in and tell them I was too ill to come in that day, which he did. The next day I went back to work and she took me aside to ask me how I was feeling and whether I was ok - bless her!!

A couple of days later I got called yet again into her office and the HR manager was present there too. Wondering what was going on, I sat numbly while she went through a list of things that I had apparently done that were in breach of my contract.

"I have spoken to you before regarding your absences", she said to me sounding as if I had done her some personal harm, but I thought she had been just checking to see if I was OK.

"I have had more than one person come upto me and say you are regularly away from your desk for upto 15 mins at a time" the HR manager said.

"Your father rang into reception when it clearly states in your contract that he should be ringing me", my manager added, "and you left 15 mins early yesterday without telling me", she looked like she was itching to just reach across the table and strangle me for my insubordination.

"You are so lucky you managed to find a job in this company, it is such a wonderful opportunity for you to move forwards, why do you want to waste it by doing things like this" the HR manager asked me in what he obviously thought was a kind voice. The message that I got from this meeting was that its ok for me to come into work at 8.30 in the morning but no way was I allowed to leave my desk throughout the day and I could only go home after 5.30!!

In the end I was given a letter outlining my apparent 'crimes' and was told to sign and return it to my manager.

I was so shocked that I had been treated like this that I wasnt able to concentrate on my work all day. My father has not read my contract, how on earth was he supposed to know who to ring?! I had been so ill I could barely lift my head up let alone remember that my manager needs to be called rather than reception. It seemed as if she was watching my every move, yet the woman who sits next to me and the person who sits behind me regularly come into the office after 9 and leave at 5 o'clock, not to mention the countless times they are away from their desks for over 20 mins (I know because I started keeping an eye on everyone after this happened). This whole episode made me so paranoid that I didnt feel I could trust anyone and even started keeping a log of the times other people were away from their desks."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 21, 2006

>> Babbling Fools

[ Fools ]

Wits-end writes...

"I work in a small department with around 15 other people. We are all around the same age and get on well, however in recent weeks some of the newer members of staff have started making themselves a bit too much at home. There are 2 particular female members of the team who have become the most irritating people to work with in the world. We'll call the first one 'Vibbi', she keeps claiming that she is so world-wise and cultured (at the grand old age of 19) because she has an Italian boyfriend, who we later found out was born in England and is called Gavin! We have to put up with her calling him several times during the day and babbling away in Italian at the top of her voice (trying to show off that she is bi-lingual) and when she's not on the phone to him she is constantly talking about him and how he's done everything in the world that can be done! No-one can mention anything without her butting in and mentioning how her boyfriend has already seen/done/been it before and did it better than anyone else. I swear that if I said that I been shot in the head with a crossbow fired by an Iraqi terrorist wearing tweed trousers, she would say that it had happened to her boyfriend several times before and he did it better than anyone else! Besides that, she's not too bad! But that brings me onto the second most annoying co-worker in the world

For the sake of this story we'll call her 'Gwed', again she is always on the phone to her boyfriend. He will call her and she will hang up straight away and call him back so that he doesn't spend his money talking to her during office time! Again she is always harping on about how great he is, apparently he is some high-flyer, earning loads of money and he does a lot a work for charity. It turns out he works for a company that charges charities to raise money for them, the money he earns comes from donations that we make to charities (a real high-flyer!). Plus we also found out that he owes her over £1000 and whenever they make arrangements for the evening's entertainment (always done in work time), she always ends up paying! That in itself is not too annoying, the most irritating thing about her is her voice, every syllable of every word of every sentence is stretched out and strained, think Keith Richards voice mixed with Frank Spencer. Again she believes she is world-wise and has experienced everything (at the grand old age of 24!); no-one can mention any experience that they have had because she's always had a better one. Anyway, Gwed is always moaning about how she never has any money and how she is always soooo busy, meanwhile I'm sitting at my desk biting my tongue because I know she is earning more than most other people here and I'm thinking that if she didn't pay for everything for her boyfriend she'd have more money and if she didn't keep coming out with her inane stories she'd have more time to get her work done.

These 2 might not seem too bad, but believe me after nearly a year of them constantly trying to out-do each other with their stories and constantly babbling on about their clearly average boyfriends, it is really beginning to grate. Luckily I have just found out that I am not alone, another 4 people in the office have come to me complaining about them and rather than trying to make them feel better, I find myself agreeing with them!

Please help, I don't know what to do, I now dread coming to work for fear of having to put up with their annoying babbling for 9 hours straight. I can't tell them to shut the f*ck up because they are friends with the manager and I'll end up looking like a trouble-maker. I enjoy my job, but they are making it unbearable."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 20, 2006

>> Sick of the "Office Stars"

[ Work ]

I'm not that frickin' dumb writes...

"Why is it that in every workplace there is some yutz who thinks that whenever the supervisor isn't in the room, he/she becomes the supervisor?

I'm a temp. Laura, a co-worker assigned to "train" me at an assignment, was correct to retrieve the memos I'd sent out with handwritten corrections. You don't do that. You re-type the memo with the corrections in it. She left the pulled memos in a stack on my desk with a note saying I should re-type them. That's ALL she had to do. Where it was over the limit was that the page-long handwritten note she left went on and on about how I shouldn't do anything on my own, but always check with her first. (Not show initiative? I thought initiative was a good thing.) The clincher was, "I've already apologized to Grant (the supervisor) for you." This ticked me off because I'm quite capable of apologizing to Grant for myself when I make a mistake, and furthermore, when I later did so, Grant didn't really give a rat's @$$. Laura, and only Laura, was the one who thought it was such a big fat slimy deal. When she went on a European vacation, she was given a send-off party and handed a card saying, "This office is going to fall apart without you." I was there to fill her position while she was on vacation. Thanks for the confidence.

Joyce, another co-worker at a grocery store, was NOT assigned to train me. But boy, did she snoopervise. She's the kind who works about 60 or 70 hours a week and thinks everybody else is lazy because they "only" work 30 or 40. If we worked on the same line, she didn't pause or help if I got bogged down. All she was about was showing what a good, efficient worker SHE was, forget about teamwork. Her instructions were often in direct opposition to what the manager had told me to do, and when I went with the manager's instructions anyway, Joyce would criticize me right there in front of customers. I'd offered a mother with small children help to the car with her groceries, and she declined. A short time later she changed her mind, and Joyce cut me down to two inches high with, "You need to help customers to the car. She's got small children; she needs all the help she can get." I checked out a customer who bought a mylar helium balloon to which she had tied a candy bar. The candy was heavy enough to weigh the balloon down and keep it from floating away. I rang up both the candy and the balloon, she declined a bag, and I set the purchase down on the belt while she paid, whereupon Joyce threw a fit. "You have to watch that balloon! It's going to float away!" Of course Joyce shut her yap when she saw that the balloon was weighted, but how the hell did she think I got to be 30+ years old and not know that helium balloons float?

God, I'm sick of people who make it their mission in life to make other people feel as stupid as possible."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 19, 2006

>> Only fools and B@#ches

[ Fools ]

Logan writes...

"Let's just say I work for a company that manages a tollway.

I've only been at this job for about 9 months and working in a 24/7 call centre, I would have expected it to be a bit quiet with not much to do over the phone but would have been allocated some tasks to do during the night.

How wrong was I. When the centre went 24/7, there was just me and two other guys that covered the phones, and suffice to say, it wasn't too much of a task. Most of the time, we would go to the breakout room and watch TV or DVDs all night.

Then miraculously we got busy and the phones rang at a fairly constant level. So management in all their wisdom decided to get one more person in to cover the phone calls.

Let us say that this person was not exactly the person we all got on with. She is abrasive and clueless. She had chosen to break up her shifts to having a block of nights together and then have a night off in between and one last night for the week. Anyone who has done nightshift work knows this sort of arrangement is not the best, and we tried to get her to see reason, but she refused to believe us and stated she's done night work like this before and the same sort of days etc.

OK, we thought she should know the deal.

Wrong again. She showed her incompetency by asking the most basic questions with regards to the type of calls and what she should do in different situations. We would all answer these with the precise information and at the end she would do her Forrest Gump impersonation and go HUH?

Listening to her trying to give information and resolve issues over the phone was very embarrasing. Several attempts at getting her to see the error of her ways has been met with the most direst of reprimands, she being determined that she knows what's right.

This is not only the wore of it. Since being on nightshift it's common practice to have all lights on to simulate daylight. Wrong! She goes and turns the lights off in the centre, which leaves only the emergency lighting on. When asked why she turned the lights off and would she mind turning them back on, she refused stating she has photosensitive eyes and the harsh florescent lights hurt her eyes. When explained she is going agains OH&S laws,she shrugs her shoulders and says she doesn't care.

Things continued for quite alot of time and it was not until a couple of weeks ago did I learn that she has made personal complaints against me citing that I was rude to her, I do not help her out when she needed helping, I withhold information about the work needed to be done (and instructions are emailed to all of us), I spike her drinks (HUH???) and accused me of being a spy for another company (again HUH????)

Suffice to say management and HR has not even had the nerve or guts to ask me about these allegations. I only found this out because a friend of mine is one of the supervisors and he is privy to such information via management meetings.

I now have another job to go to that pays so much more than the current job and cannot wait to get out of here and away from this B@#ch!"

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 18, 2006

>> I can't believe the stupidity here

[ Rant ]

ugh! writes...

"I have worked here for a good few years... It was a small operation originally, just the bosses - and then me. Now they've suddenly exploded and got three new people. They don't hire through the newspapers or agencies, no, they prefer to hire people they KNOW (so it's harder to get EDUCATED people, and it's harder to get rid of them if they're not suitable!! - duh!)
I was the only person to be hired from "the outside world"!!

A list of the fools:

Junior #1 :
Won't change the toilet paper rolls. Prefers to leave half a square on the roll. I kept a roll in a hidden place for me to use and she went to the loo a few times - and STILL there was half a piece left on the roll. I think she used the cloth hand towel and then put it back on the rack!! Ewww!
Uses COLD water to wash dishes. Food remains stuck on them, coffee rings remain on mugs. (I don't use anything from the cupboard anymore)
Uses the shredding machine until it's full and then turns it off so you can't see the "full" light so the next person who goes to use it has to empty it first.
Eats 1 kilo of lollies per week.
Wears pants too tight and says "if I eat too much I will get "love handles"" (- oh girl, sorry but they're already there and they're on DISPLAY every day!!)
She wears the SAME outfit every day for a whole week. Same top, same pants. No, it's not a suit and we don't have a uniform.

Junior #2:
Doesn't see the seriousness of her work. Makes a mistake and shrugs. Is 17 and doesn't know how to use Excel.
Eats a whole block of chocolate then says "I just ate a block of chocolate, I'm bad, aren't I?" and "I shouldn't be eating these lollies, should I?"
(Well if you know you shouldn't, don't and stop beating yourself up!!)

Peer #1:
So loud that I can't hear myself think.
Likes to tell everyone how rich she is and how much better she is than everyone else. Calls herself "Pammy" cos she thinks her boobs are huge - (er, I have news for you girlie!!)

Sir #1:
Not good at management, doesn't communicate, doesn't consult. Mumbles at meetings. Doesn't like constructive criticism or ideas. Hears my idea, says "no, that's not good" then rewords it and makes it his own.
(I have recently taken to saying "That's exactly what I just said!!" to which I get nasty looks!!)

Sir #2:
LOUD. Sings show tunes a lot. Says "she'll be apples, mate" no matter how serious the problem.

Sir 1 & 2 both smoke in under-cover areas against the law and office staff are left coughing and sneezing and feeling ill. We take more than our due sick leave every year, it's just ridiculous!! An inspector came here and warned them of the fines, but they still do it!!!!

*sigh*

(me: for not knowing how to ask for a payrise because I have just been promoted by name ("Office Manager", not numbers... and I NEED, want, deserve those numbers!! I've been getting the same wage for three years - from being a junior, to now!!)

These people are lovely, nice people most of the time, but hell, it's not easy to WORK with them some days!!!"

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 17, 2006

>> The Dumb Population Keeps Rising

[ Fools ]

Wacoidgie writes...

"They come in all shapes, sizes, genders and ethnicities and they all seem to procreate in greater numbers than the people that I know that I put in the intelligent category. First, I set near two of the biggest idiots in the population. The one is a 39 year old single mom with a 3 year old child that is constantly ill with upper respiratory problems because her dumbass mother smoked during her pregnancy and continues to smoke in the house. Somehow, even though her smoking has been pointed out as the likely cause, the dumb co-worker still does not think it is her smoking that has caused her child's constant illness. This woman talks loudly all day - either on the phone or to the other idiot that I work nearby so I have to hear about her life all day and this is why I know so much about her idiotic life. Her child's father was in jail for something related to drugs. She still hangs out with people that engage in drug-related activities. She has some sort of boyfriend now that leaches off of her and she complains about how she pretty much supports him and yet she doesn't do anything about it - even though she says she doesn't really like him all that much. She fouls up the English language all day. She also get bronchitis at least a couple times a year and coughs and probably infects us all with her nasty germs. She goes downstairs for smoke breaks around 8 times a day and yet she calls our mailroom to come down and pick up faxes for her or to bring down supplies for her or sometimes even to get her a 'pop' because she is too busy to leave her desk. I can't imagine how she is busy ever as she is constantly talking on the phone to her other idiot friends and family (though her mother just died a year ago from emphysema) and when she's not talking on the phone, she's talking to one of the two girls that sit on either side of her or to this other idiot woman that stops by her desk on their way down to their smoke break. She is constantly getting packages in from clothing or toy stores since she is constantly shopping on-line at work (she does not have a computer at home). She has the gaul to call other people in our office stupid when they make some small mistake. One time, she got mad that her 'pop' wasn't dropped off within 10 minutes of her calling our mailroom, so she said loudly that they were stupid, then called down to our mailroom again and loudly demanded, "Where's my pop? Where's ---- my---- pop?" Also, she spent $2000 on a ticket to the World Series instead of doing something really helpful for her child. She has also spent around $1000 on her daughters last birthday party when she turned 3. She's a secretary and a single mom and that seems a gross misuse of funds.

The girl that she talks to all day is also an idiot, but a completely different kind of idiot. I think she probably would do fairly well on an IQ test, but the thing is that she gets really proud of herself for the stupidest things. She declares that she works harder than anyone else there, she declares that she has a cleaner desk than anyone at work, she puts down other people to their bosses, she thinks that she is indispensible and that her boss actually cares about her and would take care to make sure that she still has a job when he retires. Her parents are from Pakistan and yet she has the arrogance to make fun of other immigrants (especially the chinese) when they can't speak English very well and thus mess up her lunch order. She decides that they are stupid and shouldn't have a business if they can't speak English well enough. She literally thinks she is perfect and that everyone else at work is beneath her. She thinks that she is an extreme expert at her job - but she is a secretary as am I. It's not like it's rocket science, you know? She is also self-righteous and thinks that because she is muslim and devout and fasts and prays and doesn't swear that she is better than the rest of us. Heaven forbid that someone have a drink.....evil of evils. She is constantly on the internet shopping for things for her kid or for clothes for herself, or looking up games or pictures for her kid to color in, she prints out lists of what she is going to do that evening and she is on the phone a lot talking in her native language or trying to run her other business while she is working at our office. As far as I'm concerned, that should be a sin and probably is for her, but in her mind, she's perfect and obviously not at all self-aware. She also thinks she is the perfect mother.

Then there is this other woman that comes down and talks to these other two idiots off and on throughout the day. This idiot doesn't stop talking all day either, is sick a lot, but continues to smoke, and thinks everything that happens is some sort of drama that requires an exclamation - especially if it is weather related. "oh my gawd, it's raining outside!"

They all talk about each other and gossip about each other. They are all very negative and are always whispering about something, some of which I can hear. They overreact to situations often and blow them out of proportion. They all talk about their kids all day, what the kids ate last night, when they went to sleep. Every morning, these women talk about their breakfasts, then talk about where they are going to order food from and who they will or won't invite to order with them and then there is always some long discussion on ordering and what they want and who will call and who will collect money, etc. Then you have to hear how much they ate after lunch and how full they are. I often have to listen to discussions surrouding their children's bowel movements, what color their snot was and what medication should be administered. Geesh, it's a goddam cold, take some cold medicine, vix, throat lozenges, tylenol - it's not like it's new stuff here.

They are all always trying to lose weight and complaining about their weight, but they keep trying all these different diets - the stupidest of which was some green tea diet where they ate a lot of toast, tuna and green tea and were constantly hungry. They've tried a bunch of other diets too - too many to list here. Yet, none has lost weight. However, not a one of them has tried actually working out on a regular basis. They try these things for a few days up to a week and then give up because they don't see results yet.

Then there's this other co-worker woman that comes to ask me questions, but it takes me 10 minutes to figure out what it is that she actually wants because she doesn't know how to not waste other people's time. Mostly, she surrounds her requests with lots of bitching about other people and stories about other people's inadequacies while wasting your time as you try to figure out what the fuck she wants.

Another idiot has probably the lowest IQ of anyone that works there and can't prioritize anything or figure out what is necessary immediately and what can wait until later and so you have to waste your time catering to her stupidity because no matter how much you try, she won't get what it is you are trying to explain to her.

Then there are the multiple people that page you when you away from your desk to ask you for something that is not at all urgent. To this day, the only people that page me for anything necessary are my bosses - and that is because they have the intelligence to know what is urgent and what is not.

There's another woman that I sort of befriended when I first started my job there. I knew she was a little crazy, but it didn't seem like a big deal. But, she turned into this woman that is bitter and is always cutting people down - especially new people. One day, she came over to my desk to gossip about this new employee that I liked. I told this woman that I didn't want to hear about it. She replied that she wasn't gossipping and that she was snipped at by this new employee and just needed to talk about it. My reply was "Whatever" because by this time I knew that all she wanted to do was cut the new employee down. So, since that day, this woman has not spoken to me - almost two years. A lovely treat on my part.

Luckily, I shouldn't have to work with these people for the rest of my life. I will be working on my MA soon and can get away from all these petty women."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 16, 2006

>> Thanks for caring...

[ Boss ]

Intern writes...

"I once worked as an intern at a radio station, which means that I was basically doing slave labor for the on-air "talent" in exchange for a few minutes of my own air time a week. The main part of this job was to pretty much do whatever I was told, and sometimes that meant doing stupid stunts that he could talk about on air.

One such memorable night, two days after Halloween, he told me and another intern to go trick-or-treating and see if anyone would give us anything. I even had to wrap the other guy in toilet paper so that he would have a mummy "costume". I should probably mention that the town the radio station was located in was a small, southern town where gun racks in pick-up trucks and suspicious rednecks are not uncommon. It wasn't exactly the safest task to be given. We couldn't say no, so we set out and decided to go to the more affluent side of town where we at least had street lights. Since we weren't allowed to tell anyone we were with the radio station, almost every house we went to just thought we were just random idiot teenagers with nothing else to do, so we got some nasty attitudes from the people we bothered and some people even thought that we were casing the neighborhood! It was not fun. Using the DJs cell phone, we had to call in every time we got something and tell him about it. After driving around a bit, we decided that we would try another neighborhood, so we drove to another street. I was so intent on getting this asanine thing done so that we could go back to the station that I didn't notice the truck that had started following us. In fact, I didn't notice it until I ended up in a dark cul-de-sac and tried to turn around. All of a sudden the truck does a

Dukes-of-Hazzard like move in front of us and traps us at the end of this street (very dark street) and a man gets out and walks towards the car. Of course, the first thing I think was "I don't want to squeal like a pig..." and the other guy was praying out loud. He knocked on our window and demanded to know what we were doing, and we spilled everything. I wasn't about to get shot at for some dumb radio-bit. When he was satisfied that we weren't out to break into anyone's house, he let us go, and we went back to the station. When we got back with the DJ, we told him what happened, thinking he'd apologize for putting us in danger. Instead he said "Why didn't you call me! That would have made a great bit!"

Wow...thanks. Jackass."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 15, 2006

>> Bosses are bad the world over

[ Boss ]

Irate in London writes...

"OK, to start with let me say that this was my first job out of uni, so I was quite naive about what to expect from a boss. There is no way I would tolerate this sort of behaviour now!

As mentioned above, I got my first real job working for a company that organised international Science conferences. My role was to help organise the conferences, sort out exhibitors, help monitor budgets, advertising, marketing, membership etc. In fact, pretty much everything.

My boss, who I shall call She-Satan for ease of reference, seemed fine at first. I couldn't understand why the part time staff hated her so much. I soon learnt.

Example 1 of the things the She-Satan would do: We had a committee of some of the world's leading Scientists. Very prestigious people, had to be very polite and butt-licking to them. Well, She-Satan sends them all an email by accident that was not complimentary (she had meant to send it to a friend). So, what does she do? Only calls the President of the Committee and tell him that I sent it! That's right, she told them I was a moron, just a stupid "tea girl" and had sent the email. From her email address on her personal, password protected lap top, apparently. Note: I sat next to her, so could hear everything she said.

Example 2: There was a heat wave at the time. Literally 100+ degrees outside. We were all drenched in sweat (I had to change at lunchtime), and were feeling sick with the heat. However, that didn't bother She-Satan. Rather than letting us have fans, or even drink at our desks, she would shout 'The law says i can't freeze you, but I'm allowed to burn you to death!'. I kid you not. All afternoon, she would suddenly burst out and shout it, followed by a slightly hysterical giggle.

Example 3: She-Satan was a back stabber and dishonest. She used to do my job until she wrote to all of the committee saying how bad her boss was (who, by all accounts was actually very good, and well-regarded). I found copies of the letters she sent in a filing cabinet I was cleaning (she was too stupid to have destroyed them)and she basically sabotaged her boss's reputation with the committee, until the boss left. Nice woman. Oh, and She-Satan still had her husband on the books, receiving pay as a 'consultant' when he hadn't worked for the company for four years.

Example 4: She-Satan was incapable of coping with stress, even though she did nothing. She spent all day writing emails to her lover. (She was married, remember). She was really embarrassing at the conferences, as she would through herself at any man that came her way. She took an amazing amount of 'business trips'....

Example 5: She-Satan was computer illiterate. She would 'update' the budget spreadsheet (ie. mess it up), then save it onto her DESKTOP. She then would moan at me for working from an old budget. Everytime i pointed out that she hadn't sent me the new one, and everytime she would point at her computer and say, "its here!" I would then have to point out the finer details of saving things onto a NETWORK, rather than a desk top. IDIOT.

She-Satan would disappear for long lunches, which we loved, as we could then spend those three hours (!) laughing at how stupid she was.

Oh, and I got the last laugh. I now earn more than she does, and I am thirty years her junior. Not bad for the 'tea girl'."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 14, 2006

>> Bored

[ Rant ]

Wally writes...

"Hi all, stumbled upon this website and all your rants etc. Some of them are purely that, I can't think of many people who can 100% say that they like their job, or the staff they have to work with.

Over here in the UK, we work the longest hours for some pretty crap pay, our holidays are generally crap too. The government will not allow parents to take their children out of school for holidays yet they refuse to force holiday companies to cap their prices, subsequently, flights and holidays go up by 40 to 60% during all holiday periods.

We are however provided with statutory sick pay in most companies, there is a National Health Service, and for all the bad things you hear about it, its better than the alternative.

My office is full of wankers though, you can come in and give a cheery good morning and most of them will blank you. Likewise, we have our usual sickies who trot out a plethora of excuses, the management content to keep them on in light of their absences.

You'll always get the work dodgers, smokers having a fag break during company time, the surfers (gosh thats me!), general unwashed etc. This just proves that the world is indeed a diverse place and that friends are chosen, but work colleagues, like relatives are foistered upon you."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 13, 2006

>> The Joys of Family Business

[ Boss ]

Anonymous writes...

"I work for this family business. Typical set-up mummy and daddy at the top (have been just about retiring since I joined) and a daughter as a managing director -- physically 43 years old -- about 17 mentally, scared of her Mummy, runs to her at every glitch and spends her days on the internet, desperately looking for Mr Right !

They still believe that working for them is like being in medieval times, with servants and queens

"Madame" -- as she likes to be called (like an over the hill Madame Claude - very often screams that if people are not happy here, they should take the ***** door and that she pays them a wage to work even if the job takes night and day to be done, she does not care. Even when she goes on holiday 2 weeks a month and 2 month during the summer leaving her "no-backbone" daughter in charge.

Some of the people that work here are just as crazy the "E Manager" listens to what people have to say in meetings and follows with "hum I was just going to say that"

The "W Manager" you need a day off well he'd better ask everybody in the firm in case it's a problem and then he will just forget to give you the answer just in case it turns out to be a problem on the day.

The "A Finance" my daughter and son go to Harvard we have sooo much money, if you need some petty cash to buy a bucket, she gives you £80 just to make sure you don't run out of money doh

The "F Manager" not to be spoken to in the afternoons as too much drink at lunch time blurrs his speech The "E Manager" and another "W staff" not to be spoken to in the afternoons, as the midday smoke session blurs their mind

The "M Manager" will end up in an institution with padded walls she makes, un-makes, corrects, deletes, writes over, prints, reprints listens to criticism, shouting depending on the different mood changes of Madame and the sopranos family.

And in the middle of all this, the few sane people left bang their head against the wall in desperation ."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 12, 2006

>> Coffee

[ Rant ]

Mystery Man writes...

"I don't drink coffee ( or tea ). Never have, never will. I am in my 30s so I am not likely to start now. Its amazing how other workers seem to find this bizarre. It always seems to cause some kind of HUGE issue. The thing is, I don't make coffee or tea either. Its not that I don't know how, its just that I am not part of that whole 'coffee' cult.

The first proper office job I had ( many years ago ) I was shown round the building complete with a trip to the kitchen.

The conversation goes a little like this,

"And this is the kitchen. We all put in this jar every week to pay for coffee, tea, milk, sugar, etc..."

"I don't drink coffee or tea"

"Oh, but you must now and again. We all put money in this jar."

"No, I don't drink coffee. Never have. I have drank maybe 2 cups in my life."

"Yes, but you must drink it now and again. We all put money in this jar and take turns making coffee for each other."

"No, I don't drink it. Never have, never will. I don't drink coffee."

"But you must have a couple of cups a day, so put some money... etc, etc.""

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 11, 2006

>> Where's the busy person?

[ Work ]

Taskman writes...

"Okay, I work at a school. There are seven technical support people who are non-teaching and assist the teachers. For assist read 'do everything for'.

Earlier this year a teacher in my faculty screwed up big time. She was about to go on maternity leave and had been coasting on project work for 5 months. The head of the faculty asked me what state the projects were in so I told him. He panicked. He told the school senior management

So he chews me out because the senior management chewed him out. He gets on my back every day, I am given deadlines to assist and complete work preparation for over 60 pupils in three different year groups who are all taking examinations and submitting coursework.

Coursework which hasn't been started by the teacher who is going on maternity break. She leaves. He continues to chew me out for not clearing deadlines. I am taking work home at night, more at the weekend and then ... The IT guy gets ill with stress and goes on leave so I get all his work as well. He has raised blood pressure...

So now I'm on call for IT related problems. All these teachers took a course four to five years ago on how to utilise (i'm choosing my words carefully) .. that's utilise ... a computer. Four years on they can barely turn one on, their kids illegally download copyrighted music and install all sorts on these laptops that cause the performance to take a nose dive. So I have to get them back to speed again. And the cycle continues. One teacher brings back a portable computer that her son has damaged the USB socket in, three times. (If you meet resistance, stop pushing and re-orientate the plug). There's all sorts wrong and my head of faculty is chewing me out again why his work isn't completed. This is the guy who doesn't work if he has no class to attend to. He sits on his ass and uses the school telephone system to make personal calls, calls to his builders, his painters, his electricians, his wife, his in-laws, his parents. The pupils have noticed the amount of time he spends on the telephone...

So I formulate a plan because I have a stack of work to do to bring a room up to code on H&S. I ask for help, I'm promised it.

Then, in the middle of this I get another 'job' - a special project that 8 teachers have been trained for and one technician has not... So now I have my head of faculty on my back, I have the IT liaison guy on my back (IT guy still off) and I have the guy in charge of this special project on my back.

I work like a crazy person right up to the end of the final term and I'm promised help to print out over 100 reports that are being printed on a new system that only I can grasp the potential of.

End of term, I take the next day off and relax ... for about 5 minutes because I realise I cannot take off two weeks vacation, I'll never get the H&S work finished. Teh help I asked for never came. The other technicians have staggered their vacation time so that the wrong people are in at the wrong time to be of no help to me. I complete the major work first and haven't started the minor work and my head of faculty (after enjoying 9 weeks off) gets on my back again and I've been given a class to teach although I am not qualified and I can do nothing about it except suck it up and suffer in silence because the union I need to join is banned in my workplace and joining unions is actively discouraged except amongst the teachers.

The crunch came two weeks ago when the HdofFac bitched to me about the Head giving me work to do. I eventually called his bluff and forced him to phone her then he lies to her about what I had told him. Just so he could feel big and important.

If I didn't need the money, I'd have left this place a long time ago.

I love the work I do, I just hate most of the people I work with, with a vengeance."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 10, 2006

>> Tales of an incapable "lifeguard"

[ Fools ]

Anonymous Lifeguard writes...

"Has anyone ever worked with someone who has 'slight' mental problems? This is not a rant to insult the unfortunately mentally handicapped, but rather an appalling memory of a guy I worked with. He is just beyond anything I've ever encountered. Lets call this guy Jim for the sake of anonymity. He is beyond "strange." How strange? Read on...

Lifeguarding is a job of responsibility. You obviously have to know the rules, be able to enforce them, and act in a mature and responsible manner (at least while on the job). This guy didn't have any of these qualities. Never mind the fact that he is about 10 years older than everyone here. While everyone who lifeguards here is somewhere between 18 and 25, Jim is 30. This is not to state that he is "too old" to be a lifeguard, this is to say that he should act mature -- act like he is 30, not like he's 12.

I'll include a condensed version of his life story here -- which I've only heard about 98406251 times from him, as he feels it is necessary to let the world know the past of his meaningful existence. For the past 8 years, he worked at KFC. He bikes because he doesn't have a car. Nor does he know how to drive. He lives with his dad in an apartment. He is not married, never had a girlfriend, nor -- as far as I can see -- will ever have one. This he told me along with some of his more obscure thoughts. These include

- "We should have walkie-talkies instead of whistles. So we can let other lifeguards know if something comes up." Yeah, that's super helpful. And you're going to get the attention of the patrons [the evil people who come visit the pool] how?

- "We should have underwater cameras... in case people drown... so we can see them" Ahh, yes, what a brilliant idea. And ... what exactly is YOUR job?

His logic is completely messed up. Some of his other ideas how to do his job include

-"No I have to be inside when I'm the only one watching the water. You know, in case the phone rings, I have to answer it..." Ok, and in case someone drowns? Ever consider that you #%@!@$#&^?

- Boss: "You shouldn't be up at the front counter looking for ANYTHING. If money goes missing -- its your fault" -- Jim's response: "Yeah, but I was just looking for a cup" ... wtf are you looking for a cup while you're supposed to be out on the pool deck watching the water?!?!

- ...

His excuses and his logic aren't all. EVERYTHING he does is wrong. He shows up late -- especially when he is supposed to open up the pool in the morning. When he finally gets there (usually between half an hour to an hour late) he meets disgruntled 60-year-old men who wanted to work out. He just ignores them and their dirty rants and opens up. Or once, he was scheduled to work, and just before the boss marked him as late, we got a phone call. Almost all the bosses are so frustrated with him (along with the rest of the staff) that they send complaints about him to the head of the recreation dept. for anything. Well, the boss turned on the loudspeakers so we could all listen to their conversation. "Yeah, hi, er... I'm in Hawaii and can't work today. I hope someone's there to sub for me" I'd include my bosses response, but some of his words aren't clean enough to write....

The list could go on and on, but it disgusts me just thinking of him. Anyhow, last week, he was finally "dismissed" from our pool as a danger to the public. He screamed at a little kid when we had a minor emergency elsewhere....... Now he's probably back at KFC."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 09, 2006

>> The Wrong Techniques

[ Fools ]

Martin writes...

"The person I am about to discuss left our company of just over a dozen people a few months ago. He worked in sales and returns; I joined the company and took the returns side away from him (he trained me up).

My first impression of him as that he was a bit dippy (his training was so poor that I thought I was not going to last my first week). Others thought he was a bit absent upstairs as well, considering his ability to missell and be confused about the features of the different products. After the revelations, this opinion of absent mindedness just grew stronger.

He is 20 and certainly a bit naive. After going on dates (his hobby it seems) he would call the girl his girlfriend right away - not after a period of time like you normally would. He claims to have had 40 girlfriends since the age of 13; not surprising considering the way, allegedly, that he treats them.

He has now written an e-book and it has been on sale via his website for a few months now. We found out about it a few weeks before he was due to leave - we were in hysterics. I knew about this 'techniques' book but assumed it to be about telephone techniques or other office stuff like that - true, he was very methodical at work. I was wrong.

He had written about sexual techniques - fingering techniques to be precise. He sells it as the guide on how to finger your girlfriend. Classic quotes from his marketing blurb website have included "Learn how to finger your girlfriend - from stratch" and "I have made all the mistakes so you do not have to!". Urm, lets not go there shall we?!?!?!?!!?!?

Picture the scene when a well known UK bank offered him a 25,000 pound overdraft facility and a business banking card (only after the 20 yr old girl who started the new account meeting had to call someone in from another branch once she asked him what the account was for, she would not handle it).

He has even put his name and address on the website (for legal reasons apparently), his parents did not know about his new venture at time of leaving. Eeek.

Methinks a good idea to get his address and sent out a flyer (looking like it comes from him) to everyone else in his road. :)"

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 08, 2006

>> How long is a piece of string?

[ Boss ]

Bean writes...

"I used to work in a place where anything computer related was my problem to fix.

We used large sheet metal punching machines which strictly speaking weren't anything to do with my job but as I ran the server they were connected to I was the one they called when the machines stopped.

I worked in the engineering department for the engineering manager (lots of stories possible there). The production manager who ran the shop floor was...out of his depth.

One day the machines stopped as they often did right in the middle of a rush job. I was informed but as I stood up to go from my office to the other end of the large building where the machines stood the production manager stopped me in my tracks.

The following conversation ensued:

PM: What's wrong with the machines?

ME: I don't know I haven't had the chance to check them out.

PM: How long will it take to work out what's wrong with them.

ME: I don't know I need to have a look at them.

PM: Well how long will it take to fix them? (his voice getting angrier)

ME: Um...I don't know...until I have a look at them...I need to work out what's wrong with them.

PM: (Shouting now and face going red) WELL HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE TO FIX THEM ONCE YOU DO KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM IS?

ME: I can't possibly know that without at least having chance to check them out. You might aswell ask how long is a piece of string.

PM: WE REALLY NEED THEM WORKING AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! THIS IS COSTING US MONEY! (lips now white)

ME: Well stop holding me up here and let me go and fix them. They wont get fixed with me here talking to you.

PM: (biting his lip, realising his folly, to proud to admit it, turns and storms away muttering).

ME: (wishing he had been given a thinking dog for the stupid...or thinking maybe they could replace him with a kapuchin monkey)."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 07, 2006

>> My co-worker has OCD

[ Fools ]

Minutely writes...

"I work with a woman who has been in this office for more than 20 years. She is actually in her 70's now and doesn't show any interest in retiring. The woman is completely paranoid about every little thing that goes on here. She worries that our "special" printer is going to have (gasp) a paper jam. She worries that everyone else is hiding some crucial, job-related info from her.

She NEVER takes time off. She is never sick, she rarely takes full days off - maybe twice a year. Mostly she'll take half days off. I think the last time she took a whole week off was when our boss told her that she had to. That was about 3 years ago.

She butts in to every conversation. She often doesn't let you put your coat away in the morning because she jumps right up and starts talking about something stupid that needs to get done. EVERYONE, repeatedly tells her that its frustrating and she needs to stop it but she forgets that after a few days. The whole day is spent fending her off, then she gets upset and doesn't talk to anyone for a day or so (those are the good days).

The woman has no life. She takes work home with her, for which she does not get paid. This is the kind of job that no one on her level should worry about after hours.

I literally ignore her. 95% of the things she puts on my desk are complete garbage. She'll find obscure mistakes on one thing and then she worries that the mistake might indicate that there is some systemic problem and we must watch out for this.

One of my personal favorites: A couple of years ago she told me that we should refrain from telling our part-time student employees that they are doing a good job because they might start to slack off. There's nothing like sending these kids out into the world unsure of their compentency and skills......

Here is another REALLY annoying thing about her. No one even dares to talk about their pets in the office anymore because this woman is obsessed with how we take care of them. Caring about animals is one thing but she takes it too far. She tried to tell me where I should get my kittens from disagreed with the coice I made. She then told me that she doesn't like when people get pets with small children in the house (which I had) because the kids could traumatize them. I told her that my child is old enough to understand how to treat animals and she is very loving. This woman basically makes everyone feel like they are bad pet parents. No one asks her for her opinion, but she'll run up and tell us what type of food we need to feed them, how often they should get groomed, what kind of leash to use, what kind of toys they need, etc. etc. etc. And she won't talk about these things once, she'll bring them up over and over again. I think she thinks that we all tie our skinny and fur-less pets to a tree and leave them outside in the middle of a blizzard with no food for days on end.

I'm just waiting for her retirement. It can't be that much longer....."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 06, 2006

>> Incompetant, Stressful Micro-Managing Blame Shifter

[ Boss ]

Anonymous writes...

"I have been working at my current company for almost two years. Like many companies, the owner is fairly intelligent and capable (the business is extremely successful), the people on the bottom are capable and hard working, and, of course, the middle management is full of disgusting evil.

There are several targets that I could choose; For now, just one will suffice. Let us call him Bob.

Bob was hired after I had been working here for about six months. He was hired partially because of his programming experience and partially because of his management experience at his previous employer.

I have an instinct for people; Within the first minute I have an idea of what kind of person someone is; Competent or foolish, trustworthy or dishonest, giving or selfish. It didn't take very long for these pre-judgements to actualize.

When he started working his job was just programming; We needed the help as there was so much to do and the department wasn't quite large enough yet for a second manager. However, he spent less time doing his work and more time planting his lips up against the rectums of others', particularly his superiors. He was constantly buying them lunch, for example, and always praising their brilliance (even when their ideas were godawful).

It was for this reason, I believe, that Bob survived and was promoted. His code was absolutely horrible: Spaghetti would be a good word for it. Buggy, unreliable, difficult to maintain... This is the man that was promoted to assistant manager only months after his hire date.

Now, don't get me wrong; For me to have respect for a manager, all he has to do is be a good manager. He doesn't need to be a good programmer. However, if he's not a good programmer, he should be honest about it and take constructive criticism well. Bob promoted himself as fantastic, which was far from the truth, and when solid proof of the contrary was found (ie, things broke) Bob would become extremely defensive, sometimes near the point of tears.

Bob's ego. What a fragile creature.

Of course, as many of you know, having a large, easily bruised and undeserved ego is a sign of other problems; Namely, bullying.

You see, by the time Bob had been promoted to assistant manager, all the other programmers had lost respect for him on a professional level. As the initial days of his promotion passed, we lost what little respect we had for him on a personal level as well.

His style of management was "Micromanage Until They Can Be Managed No More" and "I Know Best". Micromanagers are a pain in the rear to deal with, and in the field of programming, it's even worse.

Computer programming is something that takes concentration and focus; The focus is built up over time and, as you work on a project, you understand things in context. If someone disturbs you, even for a short time, you can lose that focus and context and it takes a while for you to get back into the groove. I'm sure that other disciplines work the same way. Well, with a Micro-Manager with a Micro-Brain, the interruptions were constant.

When productivity started to drop, he was the first one to pick up the I'll Fix It! banner and parade around. The biggest problem? We were being interrupted too much and it was making getting things done much more difficult. Bob was offended at this! After all, wasn't it his job to follow up on all the projects to ensure that we were getting things done? (We have project tracking software) After all, wasn't it his job to ensure that all our questions about a project were answered? (We have project managers) After all, wasn't it his job to see that we were comfortable and doing our job? (We were - before he came along).

So, as this wore on, he became more and more offended, and, given that he was in a position of power over us, he decided to strike back.

Part of his job was to look at code changes and ensure that nothing strange would go into our software and that code was written according to our coding standards. It was insulting enough that this was part of his job; Myself and any one of my co-workers could have coded circles around him our first year of college. Now that his ego was bruised, he started to fail code for petty reasons; Whomever had hurt his ego last was the one who had all their code kicked back, with stupid reasons such as:

"You mis-spelled 'the' in your comments." (We will live.)

"I don't understand what this does." (Never stopped you before... and everyone else understands it.)

"The system doesn't work like that." (Yes it does, you just don't know and don't care to find out.)

Meanwhile, the manager turned a blind eye to this and praised Bob in public. What happened behind closed doors I do not know, but since Bob still works here it's nothing beneficial to the rest of us.

Bob's behavior over the past few months has worsened.

Bob no longer has a sense of humor; Even the smallest amount of teasing that anybody else would laugh at might make him feel the need to "have a talk about your attitude."

Bob will find any reason to get you in trouble, even if it's a false accusation; His most recent tirade has been the dress code. He will accuse someone of breaking the dress code and yell at them, yet give no apology when proven incorrect. (What exactly is a "designer shirt" anyways? I'm sure that someone has designed every single shirt I wear.)

Bob will hound you mercilessly if it's something he wants Done Right Now instead of leaving you alone to do it.

Bob, after having worked here for a year and a half, still does not understand the very basics of how our system works. Yet, he will still pretend that he knows and will tell you that you're wrong even after you have proved him otherwise.

Bob will not take responsibility for anything. When something goes wrong his first response is to blame someone. That someone could be anybody as long as it is not him. It does not matter if the blame is justifiable or not; All that matters is that the situation is not HIS fault. This is most amusing when it was his code or his decision that caused the problem in the first place.

Bob is the kind of manager that makes good workers leave. As I write this, we currently have ten programmers. Six are seeking employment elsewhere. The number one reason everyone wants to quit? Bob.

Bob has caused everyone an incredible amount of stress; One programmer started having panic attacks; Another is back on anti-depressants. Personally, I have been having trouble sleeping and my appetite is almost non-existant, and when my work phone rings I feel incredibly stressed out because it MIGHT be Bob on the other end.

Perhaps the worst part of the story is that everyone above him - the programming manager, the director of IT, the CIO, AND the CEO - know that Bob is counter-productive and worthless, yet they still keep him. This is a successful company; How it remains so when it retains people like Bob is beyond my understanding.

I am incredibly thankful for the job opportunities before me right now. It gives me some respite that I will be free of Bob within the month; I just feel bad for everyone else who is stuck there because they need a paycheck and don't have an alternative at this point."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 05, 2006

>> What a BITCH

[ Boss ]

Anonymous writes...

"I'm sorry to say that this is more of a COMPLAIN than a story.... But anyway...,

Oh my GOD !!! There is this BITCH in our office who keeps talking A WHOLE LOT OF STEAMIN' PILE HORSE SHIT ALL THE TIME !!! She keeps gossiping, spreading rumours, sending false messages to people in this office and neighbouring buildings and earns a hell lot more than all of us here....

She got her job due to her dad's influence, and she thinks we are all surviving here because of her. She thinks she is the "core" of this whole organization.

Believe me, she knows nothing more than using EXCEL and POWERPOINT.... oh did I forget MS WORD ??

Well, my message for you : " **** *** "

My little newphew ( who is 11 by the way ) can use those tools a whole lot better than you SCREWBALL !!

You get paid so much for doing nothing ?

SCREW YOU !!

She thinks she knows everything... but she has to take a look in the mirror atleast once...

She is nothing but a huge, time wasting, disturbing, disgusting, arragont, ugly, over weight PIG.... !!!

GOD will punish you for causing so much of pain to me and the rest of the development team !!

GOTO HELL BIMBO !!!"

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 04, 2006

>> Happy Fourth of July To All!

[ Other ]

Happy Fourth of July To All! Rest from your fools!
01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 03, 2006

>> Disgusted and Annoyed

[ Rant ]

Wishing I had Jedi powers so I can choke him from my cube writes...

"So this large male co-worker of mine may quite possibly have the easiest job in the company. Yet he still complains (loudly and obnoxiously) every time someone asks him to do something for him. Even worse, the tone of his voice sounds like a blend of a turkey, a chicken and a seal all chiming in at once; It is very reminiscent of the melee of sounds used to create Chewbacca's voice.

Phone calls are ever worse than speaking to him in person. He begins ranting about how busy he is (when he is actually chatting about Worlds or Warcraft or whatever Role-Playing Game he's into that week) and how long it will take him to get the project done. Even though the time it takes him to tell you how busy he is double the amount of time it will take him to finish what you need.

Lard Vader seems to have been sick his entire life because he is always making some kind of phlegm-induced sounds from his cubicle. Be it coughing, choking, blowing his nose (which is very fog-horn like) or clearing his throat, he is VERY DISGUSTING--which made it very hard for me to believe that he is married, but amazingly he is.

This special guy, being a corpulent person, likes to walk very heavy, as if one leg was shorter than the other. So when he trounces through the office, it seems like we are having an earthquake. (There was actually a time when we had mistaken an actual 4.6 earthquake for his tubbiness!)

Chunk-Master Flex is also always complaining about how out of shape he is (when in fact, he's many shapes) and how he needs exercise. But the only time I've ever seen him run is when there are free doughnuts in the break room--and man can that guy move. If there is anyone from the NFL reading this and you are looking for a lead-blocker, I'll put you in touch. Just put doughnuts in the in-zone and you have yourself a superstar.

So you might be asking yourself, "why hasn't this guy talked to the ogre next door?" "I'm sure he'd change his ways if he knew how annoying he is." WRONG! I've confronted him many times about his mannerisms and he just doesn't seem to get it. Either that, or he loves being the disgusting, disgruntled, oversized-amoeba he is.

Thanks for reading."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 02, 2006

>> Psycho Boss

[ Boss ]

MCO writes...

"It was my first job out of college -- a small Point-of-Sale company near Fitchburg, MA with only 4 employees. I was the first software engineer they ever hired, and despite the fact that they insisted on paying me about half of the salary of many of my peers, I went in with the attitude that I would move mountains for them. I worked very hard, but my personality did not fit in with the rest of the employees, I was a shy single loner in his early 20's, and the other employees were mostly outgoing, married people in their 40's. Despite attempts from the other employees to try to include me and make me feel comfortable, my boss, Jeff, succeeded in making me feel like an outsider from the very beginning, by treating me like I was untrustworthy, naïve, and in need of constant supervision.

Despite the fact that Jeff had very little experience in software engineering, he would try to micro-manage my job down to the very last detail, including inspecting my work, and second-guessing my estimates on how long a project should take. He even went as far as making me come to him at the end of the workday, and plead my case to be able to leave. He would ask me what I had done that day, and then usually tell me to go back and finish a few other tasks, and then he would let me leave. Of course, I was on salary, so I did not get any extra pay for this.

Whenever he had a new project for me to work on, he would start by asking me to give him an estimate for how long it would take me. If I told him two weeks, he would say, "well, it's not really that difficult. I think you could do it in one week." I would reply that if I worked tirelessly, and if there were no unexpected problems, I may be able to get it done in one week, but we should pad the estimate just in case. But Jeff would reply that there was no reason to pad the estimate, and that I had a week to get it done. A few times, he actually invited a customer to see the product on the very date he said it was due.

The amazing thing is that I did almost always make his deadlines.

Whenever he talked to me, he would talk down to me, and with an attitude like he despised me. And I distinctly remember a conversation one day when I asked him why he was unhappy with me, and he replied, "well, you're an okay coder, but you are very arrogant." I remember being blown away by this remark. I've always suffered from a low self-confidence, but largely because of this guy, my self-confidence level at the time was on the floor. Anybody with a decent amount of self-confidence would have left the place long before.

After two years of abuse, I mentioned to a coworker that I had finally decided to leave the company, but I asked him to keep it a secret until I found another job.

About a week later, my boss called me in to his office, and started to scream at the top of his lungs. He yelled that he had figured out my plan to wait another two weeks until the company gave out their yearly holiday bonuses, and then abandon my job the next day. He furthermore threatened that if I do anything to hurt his company, he would "bury" me.

To this day, I replay that moment over and over in my head, wishing I had yelled back at him or said something smart. But I was so shocked at the time, I couldn't say much of anything."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 01, 2006

>> JLo Wanna Be & Major Slacker

[ Work ]

Jovana writes...

"I work in a small and totally pretentious office in L.A. where everyone is expected (like usual) to work long hours and be totally 100% dedicated to the job when we are here. Unfortunately, the owner is a miser and pays a couple of positions very low, so the type of person that is attracted to this position often times is a little questionable.

I have a female co-worker that has filled one of these low-paying positions and is so totally annoying in a JLo wanna be type of way that I have moved my desk so I don't have to around her any longer.

Thankfully, I was able to hide my reasoning to the boss by saying that I wanted to sit by his office, since we work so closely. Ugh. Lesser of two evils.

This girl is young, and I do keep that in mind, but is so unprofessional it's a glaring red light in her seat where her body should be.

She strolls in late, takes long lunches, plays on the computer all day, IMs, talks on her cell phone, makes personal calls, leaves the office at least 8 times a day to smoke, and has photos of herself on her desk to name a few things.

To sum it up: She is one of those low=class JLo wanna-be's and she even has tape-recorded sessions of herself singing, which she listens to all day long. UGH!!!

To make things worse, she is in client services and our clients are mostly men and when she speaks to them on the phone, she uses a very low, very sexy, very flirty voice LOUDLY that is so irritating, I want to run out of the office!

I finally had to speak up to her immediate supervisor (a friend of mine) about her style of dress one day because her outfit was so ridiculous: boobs hanging out of her top and a skirt that was flimsy and see through (she wasn't wearing any underwear), you could see her butt! That coupled with her personality and work ethic, and I couldn't take it one more second.

You ask, am I a prude or a office nerd. Not at all! I am a very stylish, attractive woman, intelligent, hard working, professional and quite nice to be around."

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled