July 30, 2004

>> Comments

[ Other ]

This was a response that was posted in another comment area but I figured it deserved its own post.

==============================

Hey All!

I just want to clarify some things for everyone. Yes, all these stories are submitted by users. Now are they all true? I have no idea since it is not like I can follow up on them. But I try and weed through the junk and post entertaining ones for you all.

I too am not very happy about the chat room nature of the comment area and that is why the chat are was launched. I know there are a few of you that are locked out by firewalls. There is nothing else I can do since I don't want to ban people etc it is still a free and open forum for all. But I do ask everyone if we can PLEASE keep the comments on topic. I do this in my spare time as I am too busy myself working with fools to be able to moderate every single thing posted here. I want this site to be a fun experience for all. I am curious for all of your suggestions. Do you know of a chat software that I could use that would satisfy everyone? Or any other ideas and/or comments.

Thanks again for making the site fun to run but please lets all try and keep it back to the topic of working with fools. I would very much appreciate it. Have a great day all.

--Disgruntled

12:17 PM - Posted by Disgruntled

>> Laziness is an art form

[ Boss ]

Anonymous writes in as one of our proud state employees who is doing little to no work but is at least honest about it unlike the one he works with...

"I'll be the first to admit, where I work, I am completely unnecessary. There are two people doing a one person job. I became the second person on this one person job about a year and a half ago because my boss insisted she was so far behind, had so much work to be done and was never going to be able to get anywhere without full time help. It's just very boring data processing. My boss is totally useless (as they all are, right?), will go months without doing a thing other than personal business but I don't say anything to any higher ups because we are NOT watched at all. We were sent to an off-site location to do our jobs and they never come out here unless if they absolutely have to. After I started, she trained me, which took about a week to do, then off to the Internet she went to shop to her heart's delight. I do all the work that comes in on a daily basis and I still have ample time to screw around. I work 10 hour days and did about 30 minutes worth of work yesterday, then had absolutely nothing left to do for the rest of the day. She does "data base maintenance" which basically means she runs an occasional report for the higher ups that they can't understand anyway and then calls everyone stupid for not understanding something she never explained to start with. She is a constant down-talker and almost every sentence that comes out of her mouth sounds like she is bitching (she usually is) and contains ample profanities. Last fall, I ended up missing about 2 weeks for emergency surgery, only to return to a stack on my desk about a foot high. The amount of work she had done while I was gone would have taken me approximately 2 hours to complete. I certainly hope she did not strain herself! Currently, it is evaluation time and she is responsible for mine. Her's also needs to be completed. She waits until after hers is done to do mine just so she ensures that she receives a higher score than I do. Must keep me in my place for I am just a peon. And yes, we are state employees."
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 29, 2004

>> Musical Misery

[ Rant ]

MusicMan writes in about some school of music and hell I am curious where this place is... rant on my friend...

I am a music teacher at a local School of Music. The owner of the school is a real idiot! He is a pompous, self indulgent, greedy, yuppie scumbag. He makes the teachers work on Holidays like Christmas, Easter and Thanksgiving...because most of his clients are Jewish and obviously do not celebrate all of the holidays. Does he come in on those days? No. Of course not, he's at his mansion with his perfect family and all his yuppie friends comparing bank accounts. This guy has control of the lessons...which can have it's benefits but usually it's the downfalls that we see most often. He will schedule you a break-which means he's cancelling lessons-but not because he's concerned with your well being. But, because he needs you to pick up his lunch, dry cleaning or drop off the mail or the deposit slip to the bank. He is only concerned with his welfare and that's it. Every year we have a huge recital, over 500 students perfom over the course of four or five days. He charges 5 bucks a head and what does he pay us? Nothing! He'll buy us a round of beer at the end of the night. F.U buddy. He also stocks a fridge full of beer at the store and encourages drinking. Some teachers over indulge and it can get ugly. This guy is a complete ass and maybe if he cared more about his employees as he does about himself he would have happier, more productive teachers. I want to strangle this idiot every time he talks about how poor he is even when he raises the prices of lessons but gives the teachers no raise what-so-ever. Then he jets off to Europe or the islands and goes out to extravagant dinners in fine french resteraunts every damn night.
He can roll up and die!!!"
01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 28, 2004

>> Where is Texas

[ Work ]

Anonymous has a short one for us but still entertaining none the less... reminds me of the time someone asked me if Argentina was in Europe...

"I actually received a phone call from someone claiming to be The Business Manager for a Logistics company wanting to do business with my company. When I told her we were located in Paris Texas, her response was 'Now, is Texas considered in the South?' You can imagine my shock - my only repsonse was 'It just doesnt get any more Southern'"
01:07 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 27, 2004

>> Is she kidding?

[ Boss ]

starry_night finds her only escape from her fool boss was to quit...

"This story not only shows what an idiot b*tch my old boss was, but it leaves a bad taste in your mouth. I was working at an upper class spa in a really nice area of town. I'm a college student, and this was a part time receptionist job, so it was perfect. I loved the people I worked with - all the massage, facial and nail people were so great. Plus I got free treatments from time to time. However, the owner of the spa, who was also involved in EVERY SINGLE aspect of the spa, was C.R.A.Z.Y. She was this woman who weighed about 300 pounds, (no joke) and the spa was her life. Now I understand that she was the owner but she did not understand the meaning delegation, and because of this she would always complain about how sick she was. Couple of crazy things she did -

- Told me she would pay me 8 dollars an hour for two weeks while I trained, then bump it up to 10; she never did.

- Would consistently yell at me, the other receptionist, and the other girls who worked there, no matter if we were on the phone, with clients, or outside.

- Would always complain about how tired she was and how she couldn't possibly come in or do this or that, and could we do it? I ended up working WAY more than I signed on to do and running all kinds of crazy errands for her.

- Would call any time, day or night, and leave tons of messages about STUPID shit… usually because she hasn’t read something correctly. It got so bad I had to change the ringer on my cell phone. To this day the ringer I had when I worked for her makes me sick to my stomach.

- One of the biggest rules was “you don't take checks from black people”. YES THAT IS WHAT SHE SAID. When she said that I almost fell out of my chair. I wanted to quit but I really needed the job, so I was stuck. And that is where this specific story comes in...

One day a well-known African American anchorwoman in our city came in with a bunch of her friends for a spa birthday thing she had planned. She had set it all up with me weeks in advance and they were all getting at least two treatments. The moment they got there, the owner was bitching about how they were too loud, they were late (they weren't) how they probably weren't going to pay for everything (WHAT?!?!) and etc. We had a masseuse at the time I'll call "Ivy". Ivy and the owner hadn't gotten along from the beginning. This particular day, since we had so many women in the spa, Ivy was using a room that wasn't normally set up for massages. It turned into this whole big drama because it didn't have all the equipment but the owner kept insisting it did and that Ivy just wasn't looking hard enough. I went to the room to help her look and while we were in there, the owner comes in, slams the door shut (the women were sitting not even a foot away from us, and the spa had THIN walls) backs Ivy into a corner and starts screaming at her about what a bitch she is and how she doesn't know anything and how the owner never should have hired her and how she (Ivy) thinks she's so smart but she has another thing coming... on and on, all while I cowered in the corner. It was so bad I really thought the owner was going to hit Ivy. And, again, the whole time, this huge group of women was right outside listening to every word.

What ended up happening was that some of the treatments ran behind, and a couple of the women got screwed out of the treatment they had planned. When they tried to talk to the owner about it, she told them she didn't have time to talk to them and pushed them out the door. They had just spent way over 1,000. I apologized and tried to get them to try something else, but at this point they had realized how crazy racist she was and just left.

Yeah, I quit really soon after that. I knew if she ever treated me like she treated Ivy, I would probably beat her and that wouldn't be good for anyone."
01:14 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 26, 2004

>> Living in the offices of emotional baggage

[ Rant ]

worst case scenario offers some helpful tips for those of you looking to make drastic changes for an office... research research research... you can never know enough about a company... so be sure...

"Hi... I am finally about to complete this internship, which has provided me with free housing in a really unaffordable section of the country. its beautiful, but working there has been a nightmare. I trekked across the country for this position, without knowing a soul... but based upon the interview with somebody who I clicked with over the phone. Upon arrival, I was told that I would not be working for the person who interviewed me, but that I will have a new employer... who has turned out to be nothing but a disorganized, critical, micromanaging stressor.

I realized at once that this was not a fit, yet beacause I was not able to afford housing, and they needed me to help run the ship, I have been sticking this job out for three or four months.... my immediate boss seems to have some sort of emotional problem like, manic depression or something.... is a serious procrastionator... talks incessantly and then when s/he realizes that nothing is getting done that needs to be done.... becomes a nightmare, to the point where s/he has punched things, swearing incessantly, and just general levels of unprofessionalness. To make matters worse, the 'boss boss' other co-workers refer to as 'le furher'...or whatever the nickname for hitler was. Basically, living in the offices, I feel like a slave...an indentured servant, right next to the 'boss boss's' offices has been a NIGHTMARE! I am expected to act professional at all times, although s/he forgets to include the fact that there are two people living in these quarters. Its absolutely been a nightmare.... i could go on and on with specifics, hypocrisy, condescending attitudes, today I was told about my 'bad attitude' and was threatend that i would not be paid if I didn't get my act together.....

Soooooo just a warning for those who are seaching out something like this a-typical work environment... BE CAREFUL and please read between the lines during those interviews! And make sure to find out all the specifics of what is going on at this company!!!!!"

01:11 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 25, 2004

>> He is not stupid!!!!!

[ Boss ]

Anonymous has the patience of a saint trying to help his fool boss work around this problem but to no avail the fool wins... while time, money and big accounts are lost in the process... oh boy...

"I train all the new hires for my district, my boss had terminated a salesman in november, vacations start in march so he had about 3 months to get someone hired and trained(4 weeks of training), so he hires a trainee 2 weeks before the vacations start, i am supposed to train for 4 weeks, after 2 weeks i am to submit a report and recommend a) proceed with training everything is going well, or b)terminate, trainee is not progressing/ or grasping the job. after 2 weeks the trainee is pulled from me and my boss decides to finish the training, i contact my boss and tell him this is the most difficult trainee i have ever had, i bring up the idea that maybe the trainee is dyslexic, the trainee was using association and colors to try to help himself, after appraoching my boss with the dyslexia idea i had to duck to avoid getting hit by the spittle, as he screamed "he is not stupid!!!" i tried to explain dyslexia to my boss figuring we could try something different to help this guy get thru the training, i might as well have been speaking aramaic, well 2 weeks go by and i ask my boss how it was going and he tells me this is the worst trainee i've ever had, so i figure this guy is out but oh no that would mean my boss would have to admit he made a mistake by hiring this guy, ego is a powerful thing, so we keep this guy on for 6 weeks, he does a poor job in every account he goes to, logs in on his time card 90+ hours a week, finally the last straw was he almost lost one our biggest accounts, and my boss' boss came out and fired the guy, all this because my boss would not admit he made a mistake, and hasn't yet."
01:07 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 24, 2004

>> I Got Screamed At For Working Hard

[ Boss ]

Shaking My Head in Disbelief after being screamed at for working hard... but c'mon we all know thats standard protocol when working for fools...

"Yes, you read that right. I got screamed at for working hard, doing multiple things at once. Here is the scene: I am a head cashier at a popular home improvement store and they are totally fixated on having a head cashier at the exit door for security reasons.
They also have their head up their ass as far as scheduling goes. Today, they had no one scheduled for the Customer Service Desk, so it falls on the Head Cashiers to man the desk because you can't leave it unattended.
We have an old lady play greeter during the day, so the door wasn't an issue for that part of the day. However, another head cashier showed up for work, and we took turns running the desk and doing the running, getting change, doing overrides, etc. I had to take the desk back because my friend had to go to lunch and I was working my butt off multitasking about 6 things at once - special orders, credit apps, phones, register, etc.
My friend just walks in from lunch and comes behind the desk to punch in. It is now time for me to go home. The store manager calls me into the office and reads me the riot act because there were 2 of us behind the desk and why isn't there someone at the door. I said it was time for me to go home and she told me that she didn't care and that I need to go to the door. So next time, I think that I will leave the Customer Service Desk unattended and stand by the precious door. I guarantee I will get screamed at for that too.
It's not my fault that they don't do the schedule right. According to them, my big fat wart hog of a department manager does such a good job. So why, then does she not get her hand out of her ass and get us some help? That is the whole cause of the problem.
Can you imagine, getting ripped up one side and down the other just for working your ass off? It makes you wonder what they all have been smoking."

01:01 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 23, 2004

>> Crunch Crunch

[ Rant ]

TheGlue has a tip for all of you considering popcorn in the office... PLEASE STOP!

"so i driving in this morning and heard about this site on the classic rock radio station. It was actually a pretty cool thing to hear after listening to a great Pink Floyd song they were playing. I'm kinda like the glue in this office, sort of trying to always keep everything together and expected to. My dad ows the company and I've been here 13 yrs now since i finshed HS. So we're now in this one room suite, thankfully we only have about 7 people that work for us and they aren't all here all the time, esp. my parents, i dont like when they're both in here it drives me crazy.

We have this one person that works here, i'll call her Roomie. I dont mind sharing her gender no one here will ever find this website and most of them don't even know how to successfully attach a file to an email let alone a stupid question from a salesman that has been here just as long as me:

"If I want to type a letter, what program do I use?"

Roomie is the one i like to complain about, she is older than me by at least 17 yrs or so, and is one of those who is constantly late, every day by at least 20-40 mins, and only works part time and leaves on the dot at her departure time of 2:30. She is off for the stupidest reasons it seems at times, yesterday she calls and says she isn't coming in because the oil light is on in her car and she needs to get it taken care of. (and that takes the five hours she was going to be here at work??? There is a Jiffy Lube right across the street from our office! It takes 30 mins right??)

That and she makes this freakin butter microwave popcorn almost every day, and we're in one room and it permeates the room and the entire hallway. I came in from DOWNSTAIRS once, in this big building and I could smell the popcorn. And its quiet in here at times too so I get to hear "crunch..crunch...crunch..."

oh what fun!! At least its quiet right now and no one is here."

01:16 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 22, 2004

>> Grammar: yous ours theres

[ Rant ]

Black Panther 2000 has a few comments for you all... specifically to all fools...

"I hated English back in school. But I am happy to say that I learned some important things - like how to speak and write properly. Now in the day of email, it kills me to see email with poor grammar.

You are = you're. Not your.
I.e.: Your going to that meeting.

They are = they're. Not their or there.
I.e: Their going to that meeting.
I.e: Are we going their?
I.e: No, there going to that meeting.

We are = we're. Not were.
I.e.: Were going to that meeting.

Contractions people!!! Use contractions! Spell check is not going to find this stuff. But these fools don't use spell check either. There is a setting in Outlook that will automatically spell check when you click on Send. We were told this when we started using it. Hello people! McFly! Are you listening??? USE CONTRACTIONS & SPELL CHECK!! "

01:11 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 21, 2004

>> Chicken Little

[ Boss ]

Anonymous shares a few vignettes from the life of the following fool...

"This site was referred to me today. I have such a sense of peace knowing I'm not alone.

I work on an IT Helpdesk. My "Lead" has earned the nickname of "Chicken Little" because of his overproductive response to everything. We call him "CL" for short. Slight problem with a server? He'll call
several deparments that have nothing to do with it. Simple request for something via email? He'll start a two-day, 20-item argument thread which ultimately ends with him answering. This guys is my LEAD. But, I have no faith in him whatsoever.

Here are a few more vignettes:

* Try to ask him anything, and you'll get three words out before being interupted and having the conversation changed to a discussion on anything from gold brick standards to all-carrot diets.

* Every day when I come in, I have to hear about how "slammed" he was with calls all morning, even if I've been sitting at my desk for a while and know he's full of shit.

* He'll send us an email, and then print the same message and put it on all of our desks.

* I'm on the phone all day, but he still yells across the room all the time for me to come to his desk. When I asked formally for him to stop this, he argued that he must yell when needed, but said he'd leave me a voicemail instead for me to go to his desk.

* When his first attempt to print an Excel file didn't work, he simply tried TWENTY-EIGHT more times. (The printer was out of paper.)

* He stresses the importance of meeting our monthly service-level, but the last time I ran it he wrote 60 cases up wrong.

* This one's the worst - he ignores us when approached, and will literally leap out of his chair when you say anything. Even if it's an emergency, he'll vociferously tell you he's too busy to deal with it and spend more time bitching than it would take to listen and respond. Then, when he hears me back at my desk say on the phone, "Sorry (manager/administrator), he's busy".. the tone changes and he's yelling to have the call transferred to him.

These are only the ones I can remember for day. I'm sure I might post some others later."

01:08 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 20, 2004

>> Coworker wants to be my friend but is stalker instead

[ Fools ]

Elizabeth has a dilemna... an unwanted friendship by this fool...

"I just have to vent about this chick who works/worked/works in my company. It all started about a year ago when she transfered to my deparment and decided to be my friend. She annoyed me from the first day, with a whiny voice, touchy hands and a please like me persona. Well, I felt bad that she didn't have any friends (what was I thinking?!) and let her come to lunch with me. She has since had lunch withus everyday, unless we sneak out behind her back, and then we have to go to a new place because she'll go to all our hangouts looking for us! So now she's thinks we're best friends, asking about my personal life, inviting herself on family excursions, etc.

Anyway, she got laid off 6 weeks ago and started calling me about lunch, the happenings at work, can I review her resume? When can we get together? Calling me on the Weekend (no one does that, not even my sister!) Anything to keep the "friendship" going and I thought I was off the hook. Now I have a stress attack everytime the phone rings.

Guess what? She got hired back! That's right, hired back! Different department but who cares? Today was her first day back and she's already been by my desk to give me a big hug and catch up! Crap! I feel trapped like I have to run and hide! Actually, we did...it was time for lunch and we were crouched low and walking out, my friend sees her coming around the corner and says "Run!", so we did
Dang, I don't know what to do? I was just trying to be nice, I didn't expect a stalker! I can't go on like this "

01:05 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 19, 2004

>> Duh,.... welcome to the Hotel,..... Im an idiot

[ Work ]

That Guy In That Hotel reminds all fools... two star hotel means just that... TWO STARS... NOT FIVE!

"What a great place it is to work at this hotel! I work at a 2 star hotel. But, the guests that walk through the door, pay for 2 stars and DEMAND 5 stars.

You see, we do not have a restaurant and so, that makes us 2 stars. Mind you, we do our best to service the guest. But, that means nothing to the guest, or management. When a cheap @$$hole guest books this 2 star hotel, they want us to somehow make-it up to them for the fact that we are 2 stars. Meaning - if they book at STANDARD ROOM, they expect to get upgraded, a late check out and free phone calls - followed by the promise that next time they stay with us they wont have to pay for the room at all.

What does management do about this - NOTHING! In fact, they encourage behavior like this from the guest and in many cases REWARD it. So, when I say "NO" to some jerk demanding free upgrades, free phone calls and such and the manager says OK - I look like an idiot. The manager doesnt even say "Well, the front desk guy was doing his job, but I will make an exception." He just makes it look like I did something horribly wrong.

Guests have DETROYED rooms and allowed back in. There are guests who hold our rooms hostage (to get a late check out) and dont even get charged
Why do I do this? Well, at 1st - I loved my job. Now, Im here for the $550 bucks I get after taxes each week. Anyone asks for something for nothing, screw them - they can have it. Or better yet, I'll drag the freaking manager to the lobby and let him deal with it. Freaking @$$hole jack-off "

01:11 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 18, 2004

>> The New Office Policy: Don't Communicate

[ Work ]

ChangeAgent works at an office with a plan to improve productivity... don't communicate... hmmm seems foolish enough to me...

"I work in a small office of about 15 employees. Most of them have been here more than 10 years, and few have ever worked significant amounts of time in any other job. As a result, they ARE the status quo, and have vested interest in maintaining it - and their power.

For example, there are many procedures that could be made much more efficient and less paper-intensive, but nothing ever comes of the lip-service discussions of how to update them, because no one really wants to have to change the way they do things. We actually have a big old ledger where each order is handwritten in sequence that dates back about 15 years. No one will even consider putting the data into an Excel spreadsheet that everyone could have access to from their desks; anyone who wants the information must go to that area, ask to see the book, and make their own notes to carry back to their desks (no xeroxing of the book is allowed!).

The boss is a wonderful person, but has that "we're like a family" mentality about work, which means (to him) that there is no reason we all shouldn't get along, and means (to the rest of us) that he's in complete denial about the underlying power struggles that go on constantly between people who know how businesses work in the real world and genuinely want to help the company do well, and those who don't give a rat's ass about anything but their own little empires.

(Who ever hatched the idea that people who work together should be "like family"? It's families that produce the f'd-up people the rest of us have to deal with at work!)

Anyway, a few of us have been trying to work on improving inter-office communication, to make it easier for everyone to do their jobs. We have begun having regular staff meetings where we each share a bit about what we're doing, so others can ask questions or make connections, and not duplicate work that others are already doing.

So what's the problem? The head of administration (one of the Entrenched) has revised the employee handbook to include the following policies:

"In general, social visiting among staff should be kept at a minimum since it tends to interfere with the work of the office.... Each employee should consider work confidential not only with reference to those outside the office, but also to other employees."

"but also to other employees"?! Isn't this institutionalized NON-communication? If I asked, the answer would be, "Of course that's not what it means." But that's what it SAYS. And doesn't that mean that staff meetings where people share what they're doing are verboten?

I suspect that the reason this policy exists is that the head of admin doesn't want people talking about what a stupid, power-crazed b'ch she is behind her back. And now, if two or more employees are seen talking about either their work or personal topics (what's left?), they're violating the policy.

My bet is that she's hoping that the people she dislikes are caught violating this policy so she can start proceedings to fire them. (And believe me, there are plenty of her anti-change minions around who are eager to rat out their colleagues for even a perceived violation.) Anyone she likes, of course, will be allowed to talk to anyone else she likes at any time about any subject without sanction.

It's not the worst story here, but it's certainly one of the worst that I've experienced in my 20+ years of employment "

01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 17, 2004

>> Can't Spell to Save Her Life

[ Fools ]

telecom guy has a short submission but I am sure you will enjoy...

"Work in Telecommunication and we are responsible for pagers. I get the same work orders from housekeeping all the time for broken pagers.

BEPPER # 555-1234 IS IN NEED OF A CLIP FO THE BACK OF IT

BEPPER # 555-5678 IS BROKE PUT NEW BATTIERS IN AND STILL DONT WORK

I know it's funny but you'd think she could spell "beeper", "for" and "battery". I just don't have the heart to correct her."

01:02 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 16, 2004

>> "If you think I need it......."

[ Fools ]

The Stockroom Girl shares with us the fact that the smartest people are the dumbest as well...

"I work for my university's Chemistry and Biochemistry department in the stockroom. If you've ever had to take a chemistry lab in college, you know what I'm talking about. I'm the person you go to for refills on reagents, to get gloves, to replace glassware you broke, etc. These last few weeks, one of the advanced classes has been working on their special projects; projects that they have to come up with something to analyze, then come up with their own procedure, what chemicals they'll need, what glassware they'll need, everything.

So, one kid is doing an experiment to see how much mercury is in fish... an experiment I find interesting because it's "real world." In order to crush his fish, he needed some liquid nitrogen, which, for a chemistry lab, is not a problem. So, I take him down do the Physical Chemistry lab, and grab the "small" tank of liquid nitrogen (approx 2 feet tall and 1.5 ft in diameter... not a "small" tank really, larger than your average propane tank). While carrying it back, I ask him "Do you want me to get the smaller dewar so you don't have to pour from the big tank into your small mortar and pestle?" (Stupid question... you're pouring liquid nitrogen from a HUGE tank into a TINY container... of course you're going to want an intermediate container.) His answer, "no... I think I can just pour directly." I blink at him for a moment then reply... "Let me rephrase what I just said. Let me get you a smaller dewar to pour with." He just grinned and said "If you think I need it."

The next part was worse... I wanted to see how absent-minded this person really is. So.. I looked at him and said.. "You want me to get you some gloves for when you handle the nitrogen?" His reply... "ehh.. naah.. I'll be fine.. I'll be careful." Again.. I blink at him.... "Let me rephrase again.. I'm going to get you some gloves." his reply.. "Oh... I need them?" I just walked off.

They don't call liquid nitrogen a "cryogenic substance" for nothing, and this student... this was no where near his first lab class. To get to the class he was taking, he had to have taken at the least 4 previous labs (1 general chemistry, 2 organics, and 1 analytical... some of the kids in here have taken 2 physical chemistry labs as well, so they're not novices). I guess it goes to show you that sometimes the smartest people.... can also be the dumbest."

01:08 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 15, 2004

>> Just Another Wasted Talent...

[ Rant ]

shootmenow has some interesting thoughts... how is it some people earn so much for doing so little? Where is the justice in that?

"I work in the creative department of a Fortune 500 company which is managed by people with balls the size of a gerbil's. We're the "unconventional types" in the company and most of us do not, in any way, fit the corporate mold.

Due to a political-fuck-o-rama (more people = more power,) we have WAY too many employees in our department. As a result, I spend my days organizing paperclips, picking lint balls off the carpet, and looking for shapes in the textures of ceiling tiles. I went to college for this...I'm still paying off student loans, for God's sake. I used to attend "really, really important meetings," but quit going when I had trouble containing my laughter when top management asked stupid questions.

I look around me and see several "zombie lifers" with this company, any one of whom I would not be surprised to see in the hall wearing a leopard-print thong and toting an Uzi one morning. This is going to be me in another twenty years (shiny pink thong.)

Why don't I leave? They pay me out the yin-yang. I have searched the market and nobody pays like these people. Meanwhile, there are people out there who dig ditches in the sun all day who make a fraction of my salary. What's wrong with this picture?"

01:07 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 14, 2004

>> Afraid of being taken advantage by fools or being foolish

[ Work ]

Job Virgin writes in with a very important question... how does one avoid fools? Comments? Anyone?

"I'm going back into the job market pretty soon and because I am an easy-going, genteel type of person, I seem to get taken advantage of by fools, especially by the fools in charge.
The last job I had which was at a telemarkteting firm, the boss was a younger 18-year-old who, after following the example of the 40+year-old fool boss who disliked me for no reason at all, started to mistreat me and would get upset when I would repeat some of the same stupid stories she would tell that was supposed to be private. The way the office was set up,ANYONE could overhear what was said and she, along with the other mindless minions in charge and butt-kissing coworkers would repeat what others would say. For instance, she talked about how she lost her virginity while drunk to one of the former bosses. They met in the bar, and according to her, they went to his house where, "whatever happened, happened." After he deflowered the cretin, he heard a knock on the door (which was his girlfriend, by the way), pushed her along with her clothes out onto the fire escape where she stood out in the cold for 30 minutes while he entertained his girlfriend. I don't know about you, but that makes her look like a complete ass. I never had quite the same respect for her either, because that makes her seem impetuous and as though she doesn't research things through. She was trying to impress the ghetto girls about how tough she was, I guess. But any whore can spread her legs. A real woman would have found out if the man was doggish, because he surely dogged her stupid ass out.
Anyway, she, the older boss, as well as others would get on me for repeating what they said, even though they said foolish stuff and other underlings would repeat them. However, they never got on the ghetto girls because they would probably kick their asses. Why are bosses like that soo stupid to think that they can keep secrtes like that when the office is a conglomeration of open-air cubicles and their desk that overlooks our cubicles is open-air too? Wouldn't sense tell you not to do that? She along with the other coworkers would say stuff within my earshot to demean me or hurt me, even though when the company was short on hour for specific calling projects, I would be the one to take up the extra hours BEFORE the sign-up sheet for extra hours was passed around. I would be the one that they would ask to train new coworkers because all the other ghettofab jerks didn't want to do it. I didn't try to do the extra work to impress her or try to amke amends with her--I did it because I understand my role as an employee and know that if there is a void or a link missing that someone has to fill it.
As I type this I realize tnat I have been foolish too, so How do I avoid being foolish and how do I avoid being taken advantge of when I go to a new job?"

01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 13, 2004

>> Lazy and Incompetent? Apply Here!

[ Rant ]

fool for working here needs to vent a little... but to me these days its a given that fools try and steal all the credit...

"My company is absolutely ridiculous! The less you know and the lazier you are, the bigger promotions you get.

My boss has worked in our company for five years as a Senior Manufacturing Engineer. He has always earned his promotions and recognitions from other employees doing his job. He also likes to use his power and control to fuck other people. He does not know how to use any of our basic and main databases we use in our company and refuses to even learn them. He evens calls them by the wrong name.

He talks to me like I am stupid.
He actually asked me if I knew how to use Excel (after I have been working there for a 1 1/2 years and use Excel everyday) and asked another man to verify that I could use it.

Anytime he asks me a questions (as simple as it could be) like "What are you working on today?", he tells me that he doesn't know what I am saying, that he is confused. (And I do not have an accent) He actually gets some man to come to his desk and explain to him what I have been doing or what I am trying to say to him.

Even though he is my boss I have to explain to him how to do his job.

He has been fighting with other co-workers saying that they are lazy and cannot do their job. My job relies on the quality of work they do, and so when they pissed on me I was rightfully upset. (I had to work 22 hours overtime that week to fix everything I had done b/c of all his screw ups!!) My boss then changed his whole attitude and gave me a lecture on how everyone makes mistakes and I should forgive him (the piss-poor guy). My boss blew it off as being a lack of training when in reality our WHOLE COMPANY has lack of training and the guy who screwed up has been doing the same job for two years!
Now my boss is getting ready to do a huge job that requires the correct information from this same piss-poor guy. I can already tell there are going to be some major problems and I am going to laugh my ass off when my boss realizes that he will have to redo all his work b/c of this same piss-poor guy! Unfortunately, I will probably be the one who has to fix it unless I get the HELL outta there.

So if your are lazy and incompetent, apply to my company! You will be instantly liked, welcomed and even promoted! This place is perfect for that kind of person "

01:03 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 12, 2004

>> Bad Hygiene

[ Fools ]

Baffled has a story that always reminds me that you just can't trust people with their hygiene...

"I work in a small investment firm. The restroom that all of us, male and female share is down the hall from my desk. One of my co-workers waits so long to pee that he is practically running to reach the bathroom a couple of times a day and leaves the door open on a regular basis. I have complained to our manager, asked him about it numerous times, and he either lies about it, or says it is because of the fact that "at home we have a bathroom in our bedroom" whatever the hell difference that makes!!! No matter what anyone says or does, he still pees with the door open. Most of the time he is walking up to my desk, tucking in his shirt and buckling his belt....one time, he had his shirt sticking out of his fly, and when I told him it was (before a client could see him) he told me, "yes, yes, I KNOW." What a nit-wit....and on top of everything else, he never washes his hands and then comes up and wants to shake. Yeah, right...it is scary that people trust this guy with investing their money....when they walk in the door, I almost scream, don't shake his hand."

01:16 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 11, 2004

>> Interview from HELL

[ Rant ]

get me outta here! rants on about work at this university run by fools...

"So I work at a private university; let's call it Screw U. Here the concept of management is completely absent, the salaries are atrocious, and the hiring protocol is to find clueless, submissive, non-confrontational "nice" relatives/friends/spouses of current employees and hire them as fast as possible to fill a vacant position; God help us if we ever actually spent quality time making a hiring decision. Basically, I am functioning in one big incestuous work cesspool. Currently a branch of my office is looking to fill a data systems position. This position has been open for MONTHS now, probably because it is listed under an incorrect and misleading job title, and also, well, because the salary range sucks ass. Well, we finally got a candidate. Which in Screw U lingo means that someone finally found a relative/friend/spouse that has been recently fired/laid-off/eliminated from their current position, who really doesn't know jack shit about the job or possess any of the qualifications, but heck, they are a "nice" person who needs a job. Yesterday, I had the extreme pleasure of being included in this candidate's preliminary interview. Here's a condensed play-by-play account of that oh so fun experience.

The supervising manager for this position is out on medical leave, but heck, we scheduled this interview anyway because this candidate is the FIRST person who has shown any interest in the position since it was posted 6 months ago and if we don't fill the position soon we might lose the position! Since the immediate supervisor was not available, a frumpy, unprofessional, newly hired director of a different department (who has a mullet and grandma sandals, and NO I am NOT kidding) conducted the interview in her absence. The interview panel was comprised of myself, the mullet, and 4 other people who don't know their asshole from a hole in the ground; a panel of 6 is a minimum requirement for all interviews at Screw U. While a few questions were asked of this candidate regarding actual job skills, some of the more exciting questions were: "You listed gardening on your resume. What kind of gardening do you like to do?"; "If you were a piece of furniture, what would you be?" NO I am NOT fucking kidding! After this little chitty-chat exchange, someone asked the candidate how she dealt with frustration. I thought "what a great question!".and sat on the edge of my seat in great anticipation of an answer that might actually give us some insight into the type of WORKER this person is. When she answered, simply, "I do not get frustrated," I was quickly reminded that I should never sit on the edge of my chair because it is much easier to THROW things at STUPID people if you are maintain good balance and posture in a full, upright, seated position. At this point I decided that I needed to attempt to refocus the group to the task at hand by asking a few more intelligible questions. I asked about her style of dealing with conflict and requested that she give us an example. She gave a half-ass response that basically said she would contact a supervisor to help mediate any situations of conflict. (Oh great, glad to know that you avoid conflict.) I asked her if she found greater satisfaction in doing the tasks necessary to complete a project or in the actual completing a project, and why. She simply answered "both." (BOTH?? it wasn't a damn multiple-choice question!!) I concluded my barrage of questions by asking her three very specific questions regarding her experience working with and manipulating data, which any person applying for this type of position should be able to answer. She answered all 3 with a simple "No." Which, for me, translated into "NO I don't have a fucking clue." At that point I was done.

The interview concluded shortly thereafter, and the panel remained in the mullet's office (yes, we conducted an interview in someone's office) in order to "debrief" about the interview. OH joy. Everyone on the panel thought she was very nice and "capable." (Capable of what? Putting the frosting in a Twinkie??) I, on the other hand and in my typical INTELLIGENT style, expressed all of my concerns regarding her lack of skills, personality, and a complete absence of an "I'm going to sell myself to you for this position" attitude. I mentioned that she did not give any examples when she was asked to "give an example" and that she seemed to simply provide canned answers to almost everything that was asked of her. One of the other panelists felt that the candidate was probably just very nervous about the interview, and suggested that we consider bringing her back for a second interview - "maybe if we ask her back, and show her that we're interested, that she will be more relaxed and do a better job answering questions." ARE YOU KIDDING ME????

They have scheduled a second interview."

01:18 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 10, 2004

>> Subject Line: Departmental Reorganization-Elimination of _______'s Position

[ Work ]

Cubedweller makes the best of this foolish situation...

"That subject line last summer was how I learned of my impending unemployment. There had been comments sputtered about cutting a position for a year and then *BLAM* one day an e-mail pops up in my inbox. No one personally came and discussed it with me. I went to HR and complained about being treated in such an impersonal, rude, unprofessional manner and while they agreed, they didn't see any reason to say anything to the manager who sent it. They did have my supervisor speak to me a week later. She apologized and said she felt "awkward." Since then I have become the invisible employee. Co-workers stopped speaking to me, stopped asking me if I wanted to go for coffee, etc. They e-mail me if they need something though they're in the same room with me. I now do only the duties that must be done and none of the little extras and certainly, no projects. The upside to this is I'm now being paid to web surf, work on my resume, look through job listings and listen to music. When I'm gone, my essential job duties will be split between a guy who sleeps every afternoon with his face on his keyboard, a computer illiterate file clerk and an asshole who has walked around since day one declaring how much she hates that place of employment and doing damn little else. I'm only sorry I'm not going to be there to see how they adjust to "work" and what happens when they realize that there's no one around to do "that" because I was the only one trained to do "that" because no one else showed any interest. The lesson I've learned over the past 5 1/2 years with this employer is this- dedication, effort and interest in the work mean nothing if you don't kiss the ass almighty."

01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 09, 2004

>> The Mystery of CDs

[ Boss ]

12acres obviously works with a CEO that has no idea what technology is...

"Working as a developer at a small scale software house, you would expect the CEO to be at least mildly oriented in the world of technology. Sadly, that is not the case.

A few weeks ago, Monday morning, 8 am, the CEO comes to my office and asks me to 'burn some CDs with a Powerpoint presentation'. I assure him this is no problem and that I would have them ready in an hour or so. "Good", he says, "but can you make the CDs rewind themselves after they've played?"

Apparently, he thought CDs were handled and played the same way as vinyl records. It's 2004! Idiot? I think so."

01:12 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 08, 2004

>> Hyper-sensitive or Hyper-fool?

[ Fools ]

Fed-Up works at a small office with a case of potential black lung... nowhere near a coal mine...

"I work at a small satelite campus of a private university. There's only 5 of us in our office, so it's important that we all work toghether and get along with each other. Well unfortunatly one of us doesn't see it that way, we'll call her, Annoying Bitch, AB for short.

While there's a ton of stories i could tell aobut her, like how she seems to have set her own hours, or completely created her own job description, this recent story truly outlines her "Idiot Status".

We are having some rather extensive renovations done to our building, we're getting a second floor added on along with several cosmetic changes like new carpeting etc....

My boss (AKA the Moron King) set up a weekly meeting with the architects so we would all know what they were planning for the coming week and could voice any comments or concerns to them. Well i happened to be in the vicinity when he told AB when the first meeting was to be and that she needed to be there.

AB suddenly and explosivly went on the defensive, for reasons no one can fathom i'm sure. She started railing about how she just couldn't make it in for that meeting and she didn't know "Why on earth SHE had to be there" (note she percieves herself to be THEE most important person in our office). I tuned her out for the most part until I heard her voice reach new heights of hysteria. This is when she started ranting about how the boss had to make sure that the builders took great care in treating the building for asbestos, as she was certain that a building this old HAD to have asbestos (oh yeah did I mention she believes she knows everything and everything she "knows" is the god given truth?) The boss, in attempting to calm her down before her ranting reached the shouting level, which is oh so professional with students in the next room, somehow prompted her to think he wasn't taking her seriously enough. So to emphasis her point she starts telling him how "if she get's black lung from this she's going to be suing the school for damages and medical bills!"

It was at this point i almost fell off my chair laughing. Now for those that don't know you can only get black lung if your a coal miner.... honest, you can't get it from construction dust. She's always been claiming she has a "hyper-immune system" (whatever that is) but wow i didn't think she could catch black lung when there have never been coal mines in this area the closest one would be, oh 5 states away?"

01:10 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 07, 2004

>> Fun with electricity

[ Boss ]

baedeker writes in as a boss and shares for once a fool story from a boss about an employee...

"yeah, i'm the boss... operating a radio station is tough... especially when your technicians insist on bringing starbucks into the booth and spilling it on the equipment, shocking themselves and destroying the soundboard... luckily for me, not all of my employees are incompetant and they are willing to stand up in court to say that the fool shocked himself out of sheer stupidity and not because it's not a fundamental rule implemented by yours truly... is it typical for a boss to care more about the equipment than the welfare of his employee? i swear, if it were anyone else i would've cared...

for future reference everyone: if you're boss is sane, please follow the rules... especially if you don't plan on getting electricuted"

01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 06, 2004

>> Cost/Benefit is Unknown Concept to Boss

[ Boss ]

Obscure IT worker has an idea that obviously didn't fly too well at the office what do you all think of gettin the new printer?

"I have a boss, "Ted" he locks himself in his office and alternates between three states, sullen uncomunicating (98%), happy and self-deprecating (1.98%), and raving insanly (0.02%, rare but highly memorable instances where he literally shakes uncontrolably).

His boss is down the hall and her boss is down from there. They generally don't talk to us either.

There is a printer room, about 300 feet away. I program and such, and you just need to print sometimes, a list to check-off... stuff like that. A low capacity printer is about $40. I get paid quite a bit. I see this as an expensive walk down the hall for the company. I've got a business degree from one of the best private colleges in the area, and I understand cost/benefit.

I mention the printer benefit. My bosses boss says, "Well, I have to walk to your end of the building to use the bathroom!" They think I'm complaining about the walk. Heck no, I'm happy to be paid for taking a walk--make that my frigging day and I'd be happy not do do any work.

Cost of printer $40, cost of adding additional bathroom at boss's boss end of building (we're on the second floor and an access road would need rerouting), I'm guessing $1.3 million.

So "Joan" (boss's boss's name witheld) YOU have to walk to the bathroom the same distance I have to walk to the printer room. Wow! Gee "Joan" that's a comparable example that you just threw at me, by the hoary beard of Zues, you have me there--what logic!!
BTW: My boss's boss used to be my boss's boss's boss but the intermediate supervisor for all 6 (SIX!) of us employees couldn't tollerate working that closely with "Tim."

It is a dream job in many ways, no real supervision and I just work with the department I'm assigned to support who all are wonderful people. Their boss is really good, just to mention that there are some out there.

Actually I'm thankful not to have the air polution from the printer in my office--ah! Time for a walk--who shall I meet along the way--then I can waste more people's time beside myself. :-)"

01:06 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 05, 2004

>> A call in

[ Boss ]

Anonymous hast his conversation showing that fools just don't listen...

"I have been sice for about a week. Here is my call in this morning. I called 2 hours before my shift.

coworker: "XYZ Corp this is ****"

me: Hi ***** my a speak to the manager on duty please.

coworker: hang on.

(pause)

coworker: who is calling?

me: This is Jessica.

coworker: are you calling in again?

me: yeah i'm still sick.

coworker: oh my f***ing god.
(puts me on hold)

manager on duty: This is ***.

me: Hi ****. I'm having to call in again today because I'm still having stomach problems.

MOD: you know you'll need a dr.s excuse.

me: Yes I know I have one.

assist manager (in background): Is that my phone sales girl?

MOD: yes

ASM: Is she calling in again?

MOD: yes

ASM: Tell her I need her to come in.

MOD: He needs you to come in.

me: I can't come in I'm sick.

MOD to ASM: She cant come in she's sick.

ASM: What's wrong with her?

MOD: What's wrong with you?

me: Stomach problems. I'm still throwing up and having diarrhea. I can't eat anything and keep it down.

MOD: She's throwing up.

ASM: Tell her to eat crackers and drink sprite and come in.

MOD: Eat some crackers and drink some sprite and come in.

Me: I CANT i'm sick. I've tried crackers and sprite and it doesn't work.

MOD: She says it doesn't work.

ASM: Tell her she better have a drs. excuse on the day she comes back.

MOD: You better have a drs. excuse the day you come back.

Me: I have one

And that's when they hung up on me."

01:07 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 04, 2004

>> What??

[ Work ]

Me writes in with some fun overheard conversations...

"I work for a large hospital system, with 4 hospitals intertwined. Here are some of the questions I have fielded from patients, doctors, and general employees.... I now answer the main phones, but used to work directly with a Doctor group.

Patient: Can you tell me when my appointment is?
Me: What kind of appointment? What are you haveing done?
Patient: I don't know.
Me: Who is your doctor?
Patient: I don't know! Don't you know?
Me: Who wants to say - Oh, darn, I forgot to put my ESP hat on today.

Doctor: Why is this patient so angry out in the waiting room? I can hear him from my office!
Me: Because we scheduled him for an 8:00 appointment like you ask us to do, and you don't come in until 9:00.
Doctor: But why is he so angry I askedMe: >sigh<

My favorite. The employee who thinks that patients are deaf.

Patient: (Speaking broken English - very nice man, arriving at 10:00, has a 1:00 appointment with us.)I'm here for my appointment.

Employee: (Yelling because she thinks because he speaks broken English, that his ears don't work.) SIR! YOU HAVE TO HAVE AN X-RAY DONE FIRST, DID YOU DO THAT YET?

Patient: An X-Ray?

Employee: (Louder) YES! AN X-RAY, DID YOU HAVE IT DONE YET?

Patient: No! (Raising his voice now also.)

Employee: YOU HAVE TO GO HAVE THAT DONE FIRST! (Employee exits, leaving he and I in the room alone.)

Patient: Geez. OK! Why was she yelling at me?

Me: >sigh<"

01:01 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 03, 2004

>> The POWERS that be.

[ Boss ]

PeterG shows us that just because you have a degree doesn't mean you can't still be a fool...

"I work in the IT department of a local University. I've been here 5 years now and am often surprised that most of these people have Masters Degrees. One happening of late was just too good to pass up.

The president of the University (We'll call him Mr. Genius) and his wife (Mrs. Genius, who is coincidentally also a Vice-President at the University) were on one of their many trips to some sunny beachside state (university-paid of course). Whenever they go, they take a University laptop with them so they can check email, etc. So about 2 days into their trip, we get a call at our helpdesk. It was Mrs. Genius. She said that they had used up the laptop's battery on the previous day. She said that she left it plugged in overnight in order to charge the battery but that it wouldn't turn on this morning. Just to make sure we knew she wasn't an idiot, she stressed the fact that she tried turning it on with and without the power cable plugged in and it wouldn't turn on either way.

So we go through the basic trouble shooting steps, have her check buttons, check the connections, etc. to no avail. Finally someone asked if the little black box (the A.C. converter on the cable) looked physically damaged. She replied that there was no box on the cable, and that the cable was white. This piqued our interest, so we asked where she had this cable plugged in. She said she had un-hooked the phone at the hotel and had plugged the laptop in there to charge.

Yes, that's correct, between the 2 of them (who earn a combined salary well over $200,000) they believed that the laptop charged through the phone cable. We tactically explained that they needed to connect the cable that had the 2 metal prongs on it. I can't imagine how they've made it this far through life."

01:12 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 02, 2004

>> You asked for it... you got it... CHAT AREA!

[ Other ]

Thats right everyone. I was able to find a great chat program that was flexible enough to be exactly like what we needed here. Which is a place to have the chats you all want to have but keeping the postings a little more relevant. So please.... its not that I don't want the usual ramble and comments, which I love! But if its alot of back and forth chatter, its probably best for the chatroom. Otherwise comments stories etc please be sure to post them! Remember the site wouldn't be what it is without you all... thanks for sticking around and making the site so much fun to run!

Information and Rules as Follows for Chat Area!

You are NOT required to register, you can just type a username and login unless it is registered.

Registration is only if you wish to retain your username and it does NOT require an email address.

It only requires a username and password.
There is NO password recovery so do not lose your password.

Chat has auto-approval if you choose register.

There are NO guarantees your username will be free so make up a new one.

The chat area is UNMODERATED so you are responsible for yourselves.

Read the help file in the chat area for any questions on how to use chat.

So play nice... and enjoy!!!

--Disgruntled Worker

CLICK HERE TO LAUNCH CHAT!

08:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

>> Letter of Appreciation

[ Boss ]

"Superior" Worker has a hilarious short submission...

"My (not-too-bright) manager was writing a letter about me to our vice-president. It was supposed to praise me for all the good work I had done on a successful project, and then it was to go in my permanent file. The letter was very complimentary, though poorly written. But I was pretty shocked when I read the following description of me: "I can truly say that [my name] is superior to none."

I just laughed. It was too late to do anything about it, and I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have understood the problem if I had tried to explain it to her."

01:14 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

July 01, 2004

>> One Year Anniversary!

[ Other ]

UPDATE: Due to the positive response a chatroom will be added very shortly... stay tuned! Thanks again to all!

Ok well its half true... the idea OFFICIALLY was born on June 13th... and the site was put up LIVE on July 1st... with some tinkering and submissions by friends iWorkWithFools was born.

I want to personally thank everyone who has submitted a story or posted a comment. The site would not be what it is today without all of you. Which is quite simply... loads of fun!!!

The site has truly grown into an amazing community and you all know who you are... the iWWF regulars... I hope you have all gotten a kick out of this as much as I have and it definitely helps the day go by with some good laughs. So spread the word help the site grow... I know there are more juicy stories out there just waiting to be ranted and raved over.

Submit your latest fool story now!

Take it easy...
Disgruntled Worker

PS - I know there is alot of madness going on in the chat. Lets try and just keep it nice and a lil more relevant to the topic of the daily post. Which of course someone each day has painfully submitted for our enjoyment. I am looking into putting up a chat board area for those that like to congregate. Might help keep the posts easier to read for people. What do you all think?

12:01 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

>> Sam and his "girlfriend"

[ Fools ]

Amazed has the story of a fool coworker and his unfortunate "girlfriend"...

"I just got done reading some stories on your website that a coworker had pointed out to me, and it inspired me to share with you the idiot in our office.

Let's call him Sam. Sam comes in to work one day all proud of himself because he went out with his "girlfriend" and bought two new suits. We find out that he spent about $600.00 on these new suits and paid an additional $90.00 for alterations and doesn't know what the problem is. Well here's two funny little things about Sam. He takes his suit jacket off because he's warm and he's wearing a nice dress shirt with big giant yellow arm pit stains. (I'm not kidding), and second, he's wearing his normal black tie shoes that he wears everyday that looks like he's had them for about 10 years. Really classy.

Anyways, let's continue...Sam has a tendency to have many, long conversations on the phone with his "girlfriend" where he tries to speaks to her in a foreign language and only knows two words. One that means kiss, and another word. Well the language that this girl speaks is also the language that one of the other women in our department speaks so we of course know what he's saying. We have to constantly gag when we hear him at the end of his conversations saying "kiss" and literaly making kissing motions and sounds to the phone. We all sit in cubes that are very close together, with no dividing walls. Sam also has another wonderfull habit that is he likes to chew with his mouth open and of course he likes to carry on conversations at the same time. Especially on the phone. Then when he is done eating, he pulls out a tooth pick and picks at his teeth for the next hour.

A particularly heartwarming story of Sam is that at Christmas time he had to do some shopping for the "girlfriend" (who we have all figured out is just using him for his money) and her son. Well he spends a few days calling around to jewlery stores to find out prices on their cubic zirconia necklaces. He informs them that he wants "A nice one". Yes - it is amazing that he can be just that cheap. Well it gets even better. He needs to get something for her 10 year old son. Should he get a toy, a game, what? I know - steal from charity. You've got it. He actually calls up the condo association that he lives at and asks them if they have any toys leftover from the charity toy drive that they did for the needy children, that would be appropriate for his girlfriends kid. Yes sir - they did and they'd let him get it. He's on the board of this association, so I guess they figured they needed to be nice to him.
I don't know about you ladies - but I'm sure sad that I can't snag myself a man like him."

12:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled