February 28, 2004

>> Damn Printer!

[ Fools ]

RadioGirl writes in one of those short fool stories that is ever so hilarious...

"Somehow I became responsible for the upkeep of the computers where I worked... One morning I come in early to find a salesperson sitting at my computer. I had the only working printer left in the building and she needed to print something. She was clicking the mouse with one hand and tapping the keyboard with the other. Every few moments she would fidgit and huff or press the power switch for the monitor, until she finally snapped at me that I couldn't even keep my computer working and she had a very important document to print out. Taking pity on her, I reached past her, pressed the Power button for my computer and turned it on. She was able to print the document shortly after that."
01:12 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 27, 2004

>> Who's On First?

[ Boss ]

Abbot and Costello all over again writes in with the horrors of management reorganization by fools...

"Management in my company's got their thumbs up their asses. My department reorganized months ago. Everyone was told, "Your job's not gonna change" and "the head count will remain flat."

Well, it's six months later and they're still "restructuring" and things are STILL CHANGING and they're hiring NEW middle managers who don't know the product and nobody knows who owns anything any more.

Who owns the main product? Who's in charge? WHO KNOWS?"
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 26, 2004

>> Cashier is no bagger

[ Fools ]

Anonymous writes in with some tips about how not to bag groceries like this fool...

"I work as a bagger in a grocery store and the cashiers are supposed to help out bagging. One cashier put groceries in the same bag as a cleaning supply. It's not supposed to be done that way since the cleaning supply could end up leaking into the food."
01:04 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 25, 2004

>> The guy who alway pulled... on himself

[ Fools ]

free-flap shares a tip for all you fools out there itchin a lil too much... people can see you makin a grab...

"Here's one I've NEVER encountered before while on a job. I worked for a News Organization in Atlanta and the group of folks I worked with were predominately guys and the work area was somewhat of a common area. On my first day there was this guy in my group speaking with a few other guys and I happened to notice him grabbing his crotch a couple of times while talking with the guys. I thought it odd but figured they were just comfortable with each other. Then within my first week at my new job I swear I counted this guy grabbing his crotch at least 5-6 times per hour - in front of any and everyone no less. It wasn't that he would just grab his crotch and try to hide that he had a bad itch but he would put a little leg lift to his habit. Kinda looked like he was trying to stretch a groin muscle while pulling a pubic hair out of his underwear. For the life of me I was floored each and every time I saw him do "the grab". I spoke with my husband about it and we discussed if this was normal guy behavior, too tight underwear or just a REALLY BAD YEAST INFECTION. I finally got up the nerve to ask his roommate who also worked in the office about "the grab" and the poor roommate just kinda laughed and blushed and said he didn't know what was going on. I worked for this place about 2 years and it wasn't until this guy actually got a girlfriend that he quit pulling on his crotch. She either gave him some Lotrimin or told him to get some larger size of underwear. And this was all before you could actually enlarge your penis with a pill!"
01:19 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 24, 2004

>> Too Full of Themselves

[ Rant ]

Ms. Unprofessional found some strength to go up against these fools... but granted it didn't need to go this far... its a shame... at least you are better off now... who else has stepped up to their fool boss and left in a steaming huff?...

"I just recently found a job with a wonderful, understanding company, but a few months ago I worked for some of the biggest idiots I have ever met. It all started when they found out that I was pregnant and going to have to take a maternity leave. The owner of the company told me that they would fill my position and if anything was open when the baby was born then I could come back. But they weren't going to lose out on any money and since they were a small business, they did not have to give me my job back. So in addition to worrying about the pregnancy in general, I also had to worry about whether or not I had a job to come back to. Also, I was driving 2 hours to work and 2 hours home from work every day because the jobs close to my home did not pay that well (not that this one was all that much better.) Because of the long commute, I wanted to start my maternity leave before my due date so that I did not end up going into labor at work or on the way to work 2 hours away from my hospital. Well, that was a whole fiasco because they weren't going to let me have any short term disability unless I gave them a doctor note telling them in detail why I couldn't work, what my restrictions were, what I could do and could not do, etc. My doctor only wrote in my note that I was pregnant and starting my maternity leave early because of my long commute. So when I gave them that note, they told me that I no longer had a job because the doctor's note was not good enough. I guess this was just their way of saving money being that they are some of the most money hungry people I have ever met. Because no one ever stayed at this place for long (people quit all the time because they were all treated like crap), this company ended up asking me to come back to work in a different department. The catch was, even though I had worked there almost a year, I had to come back like I was a new employee. So I had no medical insurance, I had to go through a 90 day probation period where I was not allowed to miss even a minute of work and I had to get these stupid reviews every 30 days, even though I had gone through all of that already. Keep in mind that I had just given birth and most of my clothes did not really fit me and I also was pretty much broke because this company had fired me. After I had been back a week, my supervisor had a "talk" with me about my clothes. Apparently on dress down Friday I had worn a T-shirt (a plain blue one) that she thought was unprofessional because it was not dressy enough. In our company handbook, it said that employees could wear t-shirts on dress down Fridays. Everyone did this, not just me and I was not coming into contact with anyone other than myself and a few co-workers. No customers saw me so it was not like I was offending anyone. But I agreed to dress more professionally even though I had no clothes that fit me and no money to buy new ones. Well, then this idiot asks me if I can do something about my hair because the roots were too dark. I color my hair, but did not have the time or money to do anything with it at that time and it did not look bad at all. I was so furious I wanted to punch this fool right in her face, but I just walked out and after that found another job really quick. They had walked all over me enough and I was not letting them treat me like that anymore."
01:05 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 23, 2004

>> The Princess

[ Fools ]

Whatamaroon writes in about that fool worker I think exists at most offices...

"Her coworkers refer to her as "The Princess", since our boss continually treats her like one. Trouble is, she's a fool. Worse yet, she hasn't the faintest clue that she is a fool. As a child, her Mommy and Daddy spoiled her rotten, and she brought the same attitude to the office along with her foolishness.

This is the woman who believed us when we told her it's quicker going to the southern part of our state since it's "downhill all the way." And the same one who (when she found a tiny flat piece of metal on her mouse pad) called our tech support to report the problem when a coworker told her it was obvious that the mouse driver had fallen out of her mouse....

She was assigned an important project but didn't have the brains, skills, or ability to do the job so our boss teamed her with a person from another agency (which bills us for their time). So, a project which the Princess should have done ended up costing an additional $140,000 plus. We all know who really the did the work, but guess who our boss gives the credit to? The Princess."
01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 22, 2004

>> Scared Silly

[ Other ]

Hoo-Boy writes in an interesting little comment... apparently we have scared him from taking a desk and tie job... personally most of them suck... but I think the real point of the site is that the fools are everywhere not just at the office... regardless as long as you are happy with things then why rock the boat?

"I've been reading this website for almost two months now, and it's had an effect on me. I work for the U.S. Government in a maritime related field, and have worked in this field (either at sea or ashore) for all of my adult life (I'm 45 now). I was contemplating getting an MBA and joining the 'desk and tie' crowd, but by reading 'iworkwithfools' daily, I've totally changed my mind. At least as a government employee I'm saved (for the most part) from managers who 'rule' capriciously, and I have some measure of job security. This is because of stringent Federal laws, and protections for those who file grievances. I was about to stick my toe into strange waters, but now I'm running back to home waters, yelling "yipe-yipe-yipe" all the way!"
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 21, 2004

>> Employees are most important riiiiiiiiiiiiight

[ Boss ]

wednesday addams has a boss that just seems to not be hearing what they preach...

"My boss has always said that employees come first when it comes to getting their checks. Pay day is every other Friday. This never changes and there is plenty of time to do the checks earlier in the week. She used to complain that she couldnt get them done because some people didnt turn in their time cards on time. These were mainly temp workers for the holidays that are gone now. That leaves 3 employees, and she even has a payroll service to make it easier. So payday was last Friday, were the checks done? Noooooooo. Her excuse this time was they would be away from thursday to sunday, so she wont have time to do the checks until tuesday. This is f'in weak, if we are so important, she would find the 5 or 10 minutes in her so called busy day to call in our checks, all whopping 3 of them but she was just too busy, but she wasn't too busy to take a 2 hour lunch or go home early when her daily migraine kicked in. LAAAAAAAAAAME!"
01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 20, 2004

>> I manage therefore I am better than you

[ Rant ]

Free At Last is one of the few posters who comes to us having escaped some fools... good luck at your new job...

"I just quit my crappy job on Friday, but after nearly a year I could not take it anymore. I came to work there as a clerk, but both managers above me quit within three weeks. I ended up doing all of the functions within the accounting department for almost a month. I went to the owner and told him I could do it. Instead, he hired someone else and I trained her. Until the day I left I was training her (9 months). The owner even told me that I had too much enthusiasm. He said "I know you just like to get the job done, but I would prefer that it take longer to get the job done but have the chain of command followed." So he would rather spend an extra $100,000 plus a year on management who does nothing than to pay someone much less than that who just gets it done. Thank god I left there!"
01:17 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 19, 2004

>> Office politics / a hole co workers

[ Rant ]

vengeance is mine writes in a rant not for those of you weak around swear words... have any of you worked in a similar environment before?

"Has anyone here ever worked with people who were just not nice. Complete f&*ing as%holes! I just left such a situation a few months ago. Not everyone there were a$^sholes however. There were actually some nice decent people there. There just a few fu%$ing pricks who did a really good job at getting under my skin. What real pisses me off is that i'm still pissed off. Why should I let these f^%king pieces of crap get me angry? Why can't I just move on? They are not in my life anymore. The reason is that the situation I just left was like being in high school. Or a f%$ing fraternity/sorority....It was a cutthroat sales environment. .. meathead, arrogant idiot assholes. Who should have gotten the crap kicked out of them in high school..talking about people behind their back, being condescending. They made you feel feel like you weren't "cool" enough for you to talk to or go to lunch with. like they had a inner circle, Like a f ing high school cafeteria. "cool" Give me a f-ing break!!! There were so many times I wanted to confront them and say "You wanna f-ing step outside!!!!" It was hard enough to focus on my job, let alone put up with these schmucks. How did I end up working with these a$#holes. who are they to judge me? WHO THE F&CK ARE THEY TO JUDGE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!Maybe I should feel sorry for them. Maybe they are just dumb, ignorant and insecure and have to justify their fear by lashing out at other people. Prior to this job I had worked for several companies. NOT ONE of them had this type of environment. The other companies were professional, mature, diverse, cerebral. I felt lie I belonged, I didn't feel "uncool" Thats what led me to conclude that I was back in high school, or some type of bullhit, 100% white liberal arts college where you had to be in a fraternity or sorority to be regarded as a human being. I'm just going to be a lot more careful and the assess the work environment of my next job. AHHHHHHHH FU%KKKKKKKKKK"
01:02 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 18, 2004

>> Self-Serving Superior's Folly

[ Boss ]

Still Mad as Hell finds out that sometimes trying to prevent the growth of fools is hindered by the fact of fools ahead of you... thus the cycle continues...

"A part-time instructor at a local college, I refused to award passing grades to two students who had done next to nothing all semester. Rumor had it that one of the loafers complained about me daily to the department chair.

This superior (????)awarded dumb and dumber C's and fired me --- and still has his job!"
01:04 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 17, 2004

>> You are how old?

[ Fools ]

Denise has a tip for the fools out there who still are depending on Mom... don't go into law enforcement... please...

"I work part time with this guy who works full time. I am 33 he is almost 30. I have never seen such a bigger mama's boy in my life. He lives 4 minutes from work and calls right before lunch to his Mom and puts in his request for lunch, so she can make him a sandwich. She calls at least three times a day just to say hello or to remind him that he has a doctor's apptment later that day. He wants to be a police officer. God help those citizens that he wants to protect. He might have to call Mommy for advise on how to catch the bad guy. I swear, I think she is still breast feeding him."
01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 16, 2004

>> Divorce or not to Divorce? That is the question

[ Fools ]

Anonymous works with the type of person we all have worked with... the one who shares their issues with all us who don't care...

"A lazy fool in my office runs around venting about her marriage to anyone and everyone. One day she loves him. The next day she wants to kill him.

She's always crying and trying to get people to feel sorry for her so she can get out of doing any work.

She's no kid, either. She's 41!

I used to feel sorry, too, but I just don't care anymore. EVERYONE's GOT PROBLEMS! Do you CARE about ours?!

Grow up, lady. SHIT OR GET OFF THE POT!

And keep your sad, sordid soap opera to yourself."
01:05 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 15, 2004

>> What a dumb "f"

[ Boss ]

Does it matter writes in with a story that ends with an important question if you left your job could your fool boss do their job?

"Ok, so I work for this company that when people ask where I work and I tell them they think I work for the most wonderful place in the world. NOT!

My job involves talking on the phone a lot on occasion our managers monitor our calls and rate them. In one rating session when I told my idiot boss what I thought my rating should be she disagreed and thought the rating should be less than what I gave it. So I asked her "Why" "Tell me what in that call does not make it a 10 rating"

The witch could not answer me. She struggled then got all nervous with her pen and said "Well you know, your right there was nothing wrong with that call"

I wanted to respond well no shit sherlock!

I have a question, why do they put inept people in management positions? I have another question, who out there works somewhere that if you left your manager would know how to do your job???"
01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 14, 2004

>> Drama Queen

[ Fools ]

Jim writes in about the desire of this fool...

"Every new employee has to have their picture taken and put up on our website as a new hire. This one particular woman decided that she didn't like the picture we were taking with our in house digital camera, so she decided to bring in her own picture. The next day she brings in an 11x17 black and white picture of her naked; you can't see anything because she's clutching herself and her daughter!!!! So we had to crop the picture and photoshop in a turtleneck. It's truly a dramatic glam shot."
01:16 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 13, 2004

>> I had to resort to EAR PLUGS

[ Fools ]

PSYCHO1IAM needed to let loose and thats okay... I think its requirement at all jobs to have one of these fools... but damn the suffering if you have to sit near there... at least you escaped... for now...

"Yes, it's true, it became necessary to use ear plugs. Her name rhymed with Tara, and when she opened her mouth you suddenly wished she hadn't! She had seriously messed up gates, and to top it all off she was quite the winer. Everyday started with a tale of her precious "two year old brat", his name rhymed with egg.

Morning approx. 9:00 a.m. we start out the day with another story about the little egg getting in trouble, throwing up, biting, hitting, or spitting on another child at daycare, not listening, or any number of egg related activities.

Sadly this went on for about 2 hours.

11:00 a.m. came and Tara seemed relaxed after venting for 2 hours. I on the other hand wanted to stuff my fist in her mouth, and yank out her vocalcords. The conversation now switched to a more business like manner, yeah right.

Tara: (in winey voice) ohhhhh, what am I going to do, I don't know how to do this. I'll never get this finished, I'm soooo stupid. Why did they hire me. (sob sob sob) I, like the moron that I must have been at the time, comforted Tara. Then Tara would go to lunch while I completed the task she was assigned.

Noon: Tara returns, receives call either from boyfriend, daycare, mother or ex-husband, usually sobs some more.

Noon-5:00 p.m. Tara talks about things non-stop. (She must have been innoculated by a phonograph needle! At this point I'd like to have a shot myself...of whiskey!) Stories continue on, some about how her former employeer had no idea how she received a college degree (ME EITHER)! She cries, laughs, cries, cries, screams suddenly, "I don't no what I'm doing", and then continues to talk about the little egg.

On some occasions she would talk about her visions(insert twlight zone theme here) (these are not facts, mind you) of being molested by her father or her dreams of the evil redheaded lady who would appear during times of stress (that must have been all the time!).

Oh my, near the end of my tenure I was seeing this redheaded lady and she suggested I place earplugs in my ears. So in went the plugs and Tara started SINGING to the radio. OH MY, do you have a co-worker who sings, or are you a worker who sings to the radio, STOP IT NOW. It annoys everyone and NO you can't carry a tune and NO I DON'T CARE THAT YOU LOVE MUSIC. Your singing sucked Tara, your stories of your pathetic personal life made my ears bleed. (I lied to her and told her I used ear plugs because I had a history of earaches and the plugs helped). Truth is my ears bled from the constant babbling and horiffic singing The ear plugs kept the blood from running down my neck.

I have since left this job. I do not miss it nor Tara.

So long Tara. Yes you are stupid, and yes your child is a brat, DEAL WITH IT.

I have great satisfaction knowing that it won't be my ears that bleed from your yacking now. You have new co-worker victims now and a new boyfriend. I hear he is is as goofy looking and simple-minded as you. My only wish is that you don't reproduce!"
01:16 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 12, 2004

>> Coffee Calendars

[ Rant ]

FlaChick writes in about some seriously foolish crap at work...

"Okay so I work in an office with a few older ladies and they have this rediculous thing called the 'coffee calendar' It posts your names on particular days when its YOUR turn to do the coffee - make it, clean up for the next day , etc. Now here is the thing. . . I dont drink the coffee here but yet I have to make the coffee and clean it. And then the funniest concept is that we have a stupid calendar for it ! Now is it me or is this gay?!? Then by the coffee maker we have instructions printed out and put above the coffee maker. Its so stupid. We're the only ones that make the coffee, i dont think we need to have instructions on how to do it in our face 24/7.

One of the guys from the records/IT dept. came to my PC one day and he saw my coffee calendar and he asked what it was and i told him. Hes like ' are you serious' and kind of laughed. I told him yea lame isnt it......he's like umm yea haha.
Too funny.

Anyone have weird things like this at work?"
01:03 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 11, 2004

>> Still living in the 1940's?

[ Boss ]

Kara escaped from the clutches of an old time fool... so history is obviously repeating itself... will bosses ever learn? I think not...

"My PHB (Pointy Haired Boss) from my last job must still have been living in the 1940's. That was her glory days, of going to the factory, doing her "Rosie the Riveter" bit.

First off, her dress code came from the 40's. This was a government law office, so the attorneys had to look nice for court, and meeting clients. However, she extended that to the support personnel, like me, the Network Admin. Men had to wear a three piece suit at all times, women had to wear a dress or skirt with heels (at least 2"), NO SLACKS OR PANTS, and hose. She has sent people home to change clothing or shoes when her ruler didn't measure a 2" heel, or the women wore pants. Now, as Network Admin, I had to crawl under a lot of desks, which means I went through a lot of pantyhose, and I live in Florida.

We were budgeted for five IS positions. Only one was funded - mine. The other four went to hire lawyers, who were "far more important" than I was, according to her. This meant that I was the ONLY computer girl for the agency. If it was beige, black or white, in five offices in two counties, I was responsible for it, and 260 users. From files, to desktops, to printers and routers, it was mine. God help me if it wasn't all at 100%, 24/7/365.

In seven years there, the only vacation I actully took was in 2000, when I took my combined sick and vacation time and spent two weeks in Las Vegas with family. The other times I had arranged, I was ordered to cancel, usually at the last minute, to handle some "crisis", such as reformatting text in a luser's word document. Even so, I still remoted in to read my mail and fix things that I could.

When I started there in 1996, the office was still using DOS and WFWG 3.11 on a single (5 license) NT4 server (with no backup) for 200 users in two counties. Why? She was comfortable with that, and didn't see any need to change. The only way I got changes made was to convince one of the two people she listened to, to convince HER to make the changes. One of these two was a consultant, who believed that on the eighth day, GOD created Microsoft. Needless to say, this was the most expensive way to do this, but it got the job done. When she whined about licensing costs, I said, "I suggested other ways to do it, but you didn't want to hear about it." Her reply: "What, that Linux thing? Nobody uses it, nobody supports it." (:boggle: Nobody, like ... IBM? US Military? Those nobodies?)

This was her attitude. If one of the two wise MEN didn't suggest it, it wasn't any good. For instance, every month she got Excel spreadsheets from the state capital. These were formatted 11x17". Every month, she wanted me to reformat them to print on her secretary's LaserJet, and keep the 14 point font. Since this violates the laws of physics, I was not able to. I suggested that we buy a printer ($350) that could print that size paper. She refused, saying it would 'clutter up' her office. She also had the habit of checking the math on a spreadsheet with a pocket calculator.

The last I heard of her was the day she fired me. Not only did she do it at 4:45 (to get a free day out of me - the termination paperwork was timestamped 8:15), she allowed me access to the servers and the network. I deleted my files and email, passed her my ID and keys, packed up my office and left, with no replacement. Oops. She didn't ask for any circuit ID's, account or user names, or passwords. Oops again.

Since then (3 months ago), printers and servers have failed, several people can't get mail, and one poor secretary has had my duties added to her own. (Why her? Why, she did her church's web site, so that qualifies her to do networking!) I pity the poor fool that takes that job, assuming she decides to fill it again."
01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 10, 2004

>> The Mother of All Airheads

[ Fools ]

Quarprete writes in a tale about a fool that was let go... but something tells me she is making much more cash now...

"I work in a corporate, professional environment. My boss hired a girl as a receptionist for the office. From the first day she started, I knew she wasn't the brightest candle on the birthday cake. She asked a lot of questions, which was fine with me for the first couple weeks, but soon I realized she was completely incompetent. She was hired into a clerical position, claiming similar clerical experience on her resume, but she didn't know how to put an attachment on an email, save a document in Word, manipulate anything in Word (other than typing), use a copy machine (it took her almost 7 hours to make 100 copies of a document once - she considered making copies AND answering the phone multi-tasking, and a full day's work). She talked to people in the most classless way on the phone. It sounded like she was talking to an ex-boyfriend - except it was really a client or associate. She would walk around kind of oblivious to her environment and bash her head into walls - on several occasions this happened. She couldn't grasp the concept of a sarcastic remark. At the end of 2 months (yes she lasted that long) I had to let her go - and on her way out she burst into tears and announced to me that she was going to become a stripper. Poor thing, I kind of miss her now!"
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 09, 2004

>> Highest productivity EVER - not even a thank you!

[ Rant ]

Anonymous has a seriously long rant to get off their chest... units run by fools... enough said...

"I have a horribly menial job. The reason I took it was for $$ security when hubby's job got unstable. As a result I had to stop going to school full-time and cut back to part-time. The job is sheer "paying off the debt/saving $$ just in case" - period.

Anyway - the point.
I've worked for this major hospital for 10 months. In that time I have exceeded all productivity goals. I exceeded the formerly "highest productivity" numbers SEVERAL times. Lets spare exact details but say that average productivity is around 5000 units (this is a clerical job- but for the sake of the post its gonna be "units" got it?) anyway - the first 3 weeks I was there I did over 6000 - with minimal errors. I was getting congratulated, thanked etc by several people who I didnt even work with - employees AND managers mind you.
Well somehow the average production dropped to 4500 per month. Guess what I did in december?
13,200

Not only was this the highest productivity for me, it wasn't just the highest productitivy for the YEAR (and i wasnt even employed there the entire year) it was the highest monthly productivity EVER --

EVER!!!

AND!! get this- for the year- I was employed there the least amount of time- and my productivity for the entire year was only 1100 transactions (units) short from having the highest prodcutivity of all the employees!

Exceptional?
I'll brag and say hell yes

a "way to go?"
nope - not a one ...

a "congratulations that's amazing keep up the good work"

not one single one

I'm the newest employee, the youngest employee, the lowest paid, the self titled "weird chick" (i wear that badge with pride thank you)
but i still feel that when ANY employee exceeds the production goal by almost FOUR TIMES
a simple "great job"
from the supervisor or manager would be nice..

what is my motivation to stay here exactly?
Is it the fact that I do the slackers work (the slacker is a fat lazy person who is purposely buddies with the supervisor so the supervisor makes excuses for her UN-exceptional lack of work each month (we're talking around 3000 transactions- the last person to do that low got F-I-R-E-D - oh but not this girl - no way - why would she? she gets the managers COFFEE every fucking day!

so ...

ok
*breath*

thank you very much ...
"you're a valuable employee and an asset to the team of mornic lazy fat-asses you work with - thank you for being such a great employee"

now i'm dreaming- right?

yep

thanks for reading (if you even did)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PS. yesterday my supervisor went over the yearly numbers with me and said "this is great, i can't wait to see what you do next year- but i'm concerned about attendance" (when i have sick time i use it- sick time doesnt get paid out when i quit AND somedays i needed to study, write papers etc- and with no appreciation at work why bother going? )
so ..
jokes on them i'm quitting in May and they will have to hire a minimum of 2 employees to replace me

fuckers"
01:06 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 08, 2004

>> It must be her . . .

[ Work ]

Anonymous shares us the horror of flying with a fool... if you have had this experience you should understand and if you haven't... read on...

"I was stuck sitting next to a coworker on a flight home from a business meeting. The flight started pleasantly, but soon turned into a flight of listening to her list all of what is wrong with me and how superior she is to me. Unfortunately, I couldn't escape. The flight was booked full. If I could have gotten into the cargo section, I would have. At one point she called me gullible, questioned my intelligence and proceeded to say (never directly) that I am inferior. She said it all with a smile and in such a way that I was stunned and wasn't really sure that what I had heard coming out of her mouth was really coming out of her mouth. I wanted to reach across the seat and rip her hair out. She is very cunning in her set downs and she always manages to do it in public situations or meetings where I would feel uncomfortable telling her how her comments are unwanted, unprofessional and of no use to the business at hand. She is a miserable person and she makes everyone around her miserable. Confronting her is no help, because she is never the one with the problen. She is superior to everyone. However, she is as sweet as pie to men. In fact, she is frighteningly gushy."
01:14 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 07, 2004

>> Lazy Bitch

[ Fools ]

Nat asks everyone if they have a fool similar to the one described in this story...

"I work in the office of a politician (non-US). The woman I work with works four days a week but after one takes into account all her work avoidance techniques, I think we'd be lucky to get 2.5 days out of her.

Things I hate about her include:

That she receives personal calls from her family every day just to 'catch up'. Every day each of her two daughters ring, her brother rings, her dad rings and her husband rings up to chat.

She says she's going out to run some errands for the boss and comes back with the week's grocery shopping for her family.

We get 30 mins for lunch. She'll make a beautician's appointment for her lunch hour and then come back and have her lunch, sit down and read the paper - taking a total of 1.5 hours for lunch.

She'll get her hair cut at her hairdresser's several suburbs away and come back 1.5 hours later. Remember, she has a long weekend EVERY weekend. She could do this stuff in her own time.

She organises her holidays and comes in and tells me and the boss that she's taking leave and when she's taking leave. She doesn't APPLY for leave which means that the boss and me (the only full-time employees who also do a lot of unpaid overtime)have to fit in around her plans. When she has arranged for her friends to visit from France and they've got their plane tickets booked, it makes it difficulty for the boss to say 'no' doesn't it?

She prys into other people's backgrounds and CANNOT mind her own business. If I have a doctor's appointment, I am interrogated as to what it is for. She tells strangers who ring the office when the boss is sick and what the boss has got. I once looked at buying a house and she asked the address of it and the next weekend took a tour of it and enquired from the agent how much it would cost.

She listens to my phone calls and afterwards, ask me to recap everything that was discussed and, if I am talking to the boss, she comes upstairs to my open plan office and listens to our conversation rather than doing her own work.

She reads my computer screen over my shoulder every time she comes upstairs where my office is, which also has the office kitchen next to it.

She sits next to our only printer and reads everything that I print off.

She criticises my decisions (which have been made in consultation with the boss, unbeknown to her) in front of people when she doesn't even know what I do.

Does any of this sound familiar to other people?"
01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 06, 2004

>> Foolish Coach

[ Boss ]

chyp shows us how a fool does things when they are in charge of training...

"Hi, I work for a rather large telecom company in the customer service field and I had a boss come up to me one day and ask if he could 'coach' me on a call. I said sure why not? In the middle of the next call that I took, he announced that he wanted to talk to the customer. The customer wanted to add a distintive ring number to his phone for a fax machine. John tried to shove a complete package of features and an additional line down this poor customers throat. The customer started cussing John out and hung up on the person. That he was even trying to coach me meant I had to act serious but it was the funniest things that I had seen in some time..."
01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 05, 2004

>> Ladies with issues...

[ Work ]

Ness reminds us that sometimes the only way to escape a fool is to quit... at your own risk...

"I started an MA degree and needed a job to support myself ASAP so took a job as a waitress/assistant which I was vastly overqualified for. I had previously run my own shop, which I told my new employer about and which she initially thought was wonderful.

Anyway things were going great, and it was a job I could do standing on my head which I worked hard at. But about three weeks into the job the female only staff body started bein really bitchy to me. I was wondering what was going on, as they were speaking to me like shit, and realised when I had a comment along the lines of:

"Surely you should know that...I mean you're at University"

The thing was that I was following all of the rules they had implemented only to be told I was doing it wrong! These women were really sad individuals, you know the type - they all bitched about each other behind their backs but were sweet as pie to each others faces.

Anyway one day I couldn't handle the bitchiness anymore so I quit the job and never went back since.

And I never ever want to go back to that coffee shop in Swansea ever again."
01:05 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 04, 2004

>> Marines couldn't keep him either

[ Fools ]

Blue4dlphns shares a tale about a young fool who is was a Marine to be... who might not even cut it in the Marines...

"Back during the summer I hired a young man getting ready to join the Marines...boy what a mistake. When I hired him he was trained by my supervisor (he's a male). When I came back from my days off I tried to correct him on something he was doing. His response to me was that he was told not to listen to anyone but my supervisor. So I immediately called my supervisor and ask him. He told me that he told him not listen to any of the other insiders about what he needed to do. Never told him not to listen to me. I mean come on I am the Damn Manager. Well I think about a week went by I had to correct him on several occassions and damn was that a mistake. I had several meetings with him and then I had to bring my supervisor on one of the occassions. He told me that I was being too aggressive when I spoke to him and actually it wasn't me that was being aggressive it was my supervisor.

Then the last day that he worked I had to bring him in to the office and he told me that he felt like I was always picking on him. When I explained to him I am not picking on him things needed to be made a certain way and I was finding that he wasn't following the standards he just got more irate at me. Well he proceed to call me names like Fat nicotine bitch, telling me to shut up, fuck off. All my employees were in shock over what he was saying and some of them thought he was actually going to hit me and they were ready to let him have it. Well he walked out! I am glad to be rid of him. I guess he went into the Marines but after two months I saw him applying for a job in the same plaza as us. Guess he couldn't deal with taking directions even from the Drill Sergant! She must of been a woman...LOL. Hey at least I don't have him still trying to push the military on my employees....Don't get me wrong I believe in the Military but please enough is enough. He kept telling me that it was his job to do that (to try to encourage people to join) Please when you work for another company. Then it was I was not allowing him to voice his First Admendment...Oh this dear boy was a winner let me tell you. Glad to be rid of him for sure. Its a good laugh now!"
01:10 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 03, 2004

>> Does She Have Time for Work??

[ Fools ]

Annoyed is working with that person I have had great experience of working with... the annoyingly close to you fool... I must recommend investing in headphones...

"I unfortunately sit in a cubicle right across from a very unmotivated, apparently traumatized girl that holds a similar position to me. She loudly invites people to join her in online Scrabble games throughout the day and holds conversations with me even if I am obviously working on a project. She averages about 3 daily telephone calls to her crap boyfriend, who always says or has done something to make her very emotional and usually cry loudly at her desk. Then, she averages about 4 daily telephone calls to her mother, recounting every excrutiating detail of her boyfriend calls with what she thinks is dramatic flair, but in reality is just a loud, obnoxious voice. The people with offices around our cubicles almost always shut their doors (which has prompted her to say "gawd that's rude" loudly at their doors), and can therefore shut her out and get some work done during the workday. I, on the other hand, end up knowing way too many intimate details of her life, including the fact that her boyfriend tries to break up with her because they are obviously not working out, but she won't let him.

She also has nervous breakdowns about once every two weeks, with causes ranging from a "horrible migraine" (although she hasn't had a headache before or since) to "her cat vomited and she is horribly worried." These nervous breakdowns take up 1/3 to 1/2 a workday, and I once had to escort her to the emergency room. All she did was speak so loudly there, that emergency room doctors has to shush her repeatedly until they could attend to her and get her checked out. It was not an emergency, it was that faked migraine, so she also took medical resources away from people that might have really needed it.

I sit in a cubicle and cannot get away from her! I don't have a clue how any of her work gets done; I only know that she hasn't been fired yet. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!"
12:08 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

>> Thanks to all who voted!

[ Rant ]

Wow... thanks to all who showed their support for iWorkWithFools.com!

We earned a Coolness Rating of 9.356!

Way to go! This is definitely a community based site and I am glad to see people are enjoying the stories while hopefully getting a laugh out of how miserable things can be other than where you are already.

Fools are everywhere... share your story today so at least we can laugh at your pain!

12:06 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 02, 2004

>> Who Says Fools Can't Win? Welcome To The Cool Site Of The Day!

[ Other ]

I can't make this crap up! (much like the content on this site...) Yet, we actually won something for venting and sharing about the fools we all work with... too bad it won't change things.

>> Office Dares

[ Other ]

Anonymous writes in with one of the best ideas in a while here... Office Dares... lets see what you can add to the list...

"Since I work in a place that sucks too, I empthathize with everyone. Here's something to bring cheerful sunshine into your day:

Office DARES
1) Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers.
2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask,"Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".
3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).
4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).
5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting."
01:00 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

February 01, 2004

>> The most irritating boss in the world?

[ Boss ]

OnTheEdge works for a boss thats annoying... which one isn't? But the part about recycling gifts... now thats truly fool worthy...

"My boss is one of the most annoying people I have had the misfortune to meet, let alone work for. He does impressions and tells funny stories/jokes which are great the first time round, but can become quite tedious when you hear them on rotation all year round. He also has a company car (which he does not really need) and constantly regails us with his tales of woe regarding the hassle it causes him, despite the fact that we all have to pay for our own cars and couldn't care less. He is extremely tight with both his own and the company's money - to the point where we didn't have a Christmas party and the gifts he gave us were ones he received from others but didn't want - yet we hear him on the phone to people saying about how generous he is!

All this is bad enough, but the worst part is that he has absolutely nothing to do. He is 'winding down' in the last few years leading up to his retirement and has no interest in the day-to-day workings of the office, so he spends his time distracting us from our jobs because he is bored. The best we can hope for is stories about his sons, but usually it's just singing (stuff like The Osmonds) or drumming on the desk. He won't go into his own office now as he prefers to be out with the 'team', and even putting the radio on doesn't stop him singing to his own tune. I really despair at times!"
01:19 AM - Posted by Disgruntled