January 30, 2004

>> Bad idea for a break

[ Work ]

Anonymous writes in with a story and seeks answers... personally I think fools all try to stab you in the back any chance they can... so watch out!

"Well awhile back I worked at this certain sports medicine office as a part-time receptionist. This was just my third job and I was naive and had no idea people would 'be out to get me.' There was also another lady I worked with that was the full-time receptionist and she was sort of my teacher or the person I looked up to while I worked there. One day we were just relaxing at the desk and she was reading a People Magazine. Since we had some downtime we chatted about the articles and stars, etc. There were 2 Physical Therapists that worked there and were our 'bosses.' One is very nice, funny, laid back, the other guy is pretty straight forward, no feeling, polite BUT cold. The straight forward guy walked over to us and asked how we were, what we were reading, tried joking with us, etc.

Later that evening when the full-time receptionist left, I picked up the same magazine and just flipped through it. The next day I find out I had to meet with the manager of us and the therapists. In the meeting I learn she is disciplining me for reading a magazine and was dissappointed because she thought I was 'proffesional.' This is coming from the same lady that said she had a son my age blah, blah, you remind of him, blah, blah during my training last week. Of course I was puzzled since the other lady had done the same thing and didn't get disciplined.

This is when I learned of work issues and politics.

I know for fact the straight forward therapist 'turned me in.' I never confronted him about it because I was just appalled. The full-time receptionist just acted like nothing was wrong. Several months later when I started college I told the full-time receptionist I would be changing my schedule. She said that it wouldn't be possible and said I guess you are quitting. I said I didn't want to quit what you are talking about, etc. By the end of the week I found out that I was 'quitting.' I didn't protest this since I felt like I wasn't wanted there and from day one they wanted me out of that office.

Until this day I am still confused on what was going on in that office. Did they hate me? For what reason?"
01:22 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 29, 2004

>> The Hermanator

[ Rant ]

No_Key_Bandit writes in with the short fool story of the year so far... very resourceful techniques I hope you all take note to use when you are targeted...

"He stands almost statuesque in the doorway of my cubicle. His eyes are focused on mine in an unblinking stare that I can not break. Fear clouds over my heart and I begin to sweat. I have been targeted for.

HERMANATION!

He begins to speak.
"...so then he said, 'you'll need two coats of driveway sealer if you want this to seal correctly.' That's when I said, 'No way I'm gonna pay, blah blah blah blah blah..."

In truth, Herman is a really nice guy. Quite unlike many of the back-stabbing, worthless idiots that are employed here, Herman actually works. Herman isn't catty. If Herman says he'll do something, then by gosh it gets done! Herman's only real fault is that he can talk--for hours --about the most boring subjects you can possibly imagine.

I have a look of desperation on my face. The fight-or-flight instinct tries to take over. I don't have any lead pipes or grenades in my cube, so the "fight" part is out. As Herman is blocking the entrance of my cubicle, I can't easily run either. I glance at the cubicle wall. Hmmm... soft. I could distract him and maybe gnaw my way to freedom. A co-worker (Brian) notices my dilemma, he quickly goes into an empty cube and dials my number. As I pick up the phone, Herman leaves. "Is he gone?" asks Brian. "Yeah, thanks!" I say. We both hang up. Brian returns to his cubicle. I return to work.

The Hermanator is on the move. Scanning... scanning... he moves to Brian's cubicle. Oh no! Got to save him! I dial Brian's number. His phone rings and he picks it up. Herman stops talking, and sits in Brian's chair. Brian and I try to wait him out. No good. The Herminator is patient. He will win any war of attrition. I hang up. It looks like it's all over for Brian. But then... wait! It's Misti, the silicon transplant recipient from Marketing! She glides over to Brian's cube. She is wearing her I-want-you-to-my-bidding outfit. It consists of a white silk shirt with about two buttons near the bottom and a short (yet barely professional) skirt. "Herman..." she coos. "Do you know how to change the printer ink thingie?" She flips her long brown hair over her shoulder revealing an ample amount of cleavage. "SURE!" Herman almost yells. He bolts upright and knocks the chair over. "OH! Uh. Sorry Brian. Uh... I'll tell you about this later." "OK!" says Brian. Probably not today though. This morning, I noticed a large number of boxes on Misti's desk that needed to be taken to another building and it's raining."
01:20 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 28, 2004

>> Can I hold your baby while you feel my shoes?

[ Boss ]

I Hate You All shares what I am not sure is a mentally ill fool or just a plain fool...

"Ok, here's yet another example of the delightful fools that I know and hate.

I temped at an office for about three months doing reception and data entry. During those three months the head of the Columbus Branch was working up in our office for some reason. He seemed really nice and went out of his way to get to know everyone.

Though I was the first person that he saw everyday when he came in and the last person that he saw as he left, he would constantly introduce himself to me as if he had never met me before. That was annoying and strange.

One day, he came into the office carrying a baby doll which was dressed in a tiny suit exactly like the one he was wearing. He carried it around with him all day long, introducing it to people as his son. He even asked me to hold it while he got his coffee instead of just leaving it on his desk, as a normal person would.

At the end of that day he took his "son" home all dressed up for the cold weather, hat, gloves, boots, and all. It was kind of disturbing, and never really explained. Everyone just seemed to roll their eyes and smile politely at him.

About a week after his being there, I discovered his foot fetish. A girl that I worked with while doing data entry often wore these crazy but cute stripper kind of shoes. She was like seven months pregnant, but still wore these crazy heels. Anyways, he would constantly come into our area, even though he had no real need to be there just to see what kind of shoes she was wearing each day. He would ask her all kinds of questions that were extremely strange like "Do your feet get all sweaty in those shoes?" "Does your husband rub your feet at the end of the day?" "Do you like getting your feet rubbed?" very strange stuff. Anyways, one day she wore these sort of furry shoes and that set him over the edge. There he was, in a nicely tailored suit, on all fours, on the dirty floor, petting her shoes.

Mostly I find stuff like this funny. I'm a people watcher and I enjoy seeing people do stupid and weird stuff. So, you can imagine that though I do hate most of my coworkers and I do find them incredibly annoying, at least I'm always entertained!"
01:01 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 27, 2004

>> Black Out

[ Work ]

Roy is obviously a poor bastard to deal with these fools... I feel your pain...

"I work for a large department store chain. My job is to make sure that everything is working, and one of my jobs is to run a power generator once a week. It is common for the team members to talk down to people that maintain the stores. Recently we had a black out and the light system is designed to run at 10 percent during a black out. Relatively smart people turn completely stupid when we loose power.

Here is a list of some of the things I was asked during the last black out:

do you know the lights are out (No but thanks)
do you think we should pass out flash lights (Only if you want to see)
when are the lights coming back on (after they pull the dead cat off the conductors)
How much longer are we going to be in the dark. (some of us will always be in the dark)
what will happen to the food if we keep opening the doors to the freezer (The food may freeze solid)
how come the generator only runs some of the lights (we could not get the one that would run a city block to fit behind the store)
how much darker will it get if we loose the rest of the lights (very dark even black)
why did they pick this time to knock down a power pole (Damm Nun)
Isn't the store romantic (???)
did you call someone and tell them the lights are out (arrrYup as I rub my toe on the floor)
should we lock the pharmacy

and the best line

"WHAT DID YOU DO"!!! ( I always say "I was playing with the wires in the big electrical box and touched two together")"
01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 26, 2004

>> Idiots & Co.

[ Rant ]

Princess Pissed Off writes in with a rant and sometimes we just need to get stuff off our chest... especially when working with a bonehead like Mrs. Superiority...

"I swear that I work in the remedial office of the movie Office Space (if you're posting on this site and haven't watched it, you are totally missing out). First of all, no one in this office came with a brain. No one can think for themselves and they make the stupidest mistakes. But my favorite is Mrs. Superiority herself. Most of our employees do not have college educations (not that you need one to be happy in life, but Mrs. S. thinks you do, and to be superior you should have one. She is not too bright).

So Mrs. S. holds a nice position here... when she's not sick. She was attacked by the flu (so it was a nice Christmas here) but only came back with her neubulizer and ionic air purifier that is so freaking noisy. She then feels the need to tell EVERYONE who calls her that she is sick, what her ailment is of the week (she's a hypercondriac-she is the reason insurance is so high for us decent people). She acts like the world is her Burger King-her way right away. When she's not sneezing on someone or barging into my office to annoy me (which, her mere presence can do), she is talking to someone in her 'field' about her ridiculous loser degree. She is getting one of those online degrees b/c everyone in her field is doing it. But this stupid degree will yield this weirdos who are doing it some type of DOCTRATE. So, in a few years, you'll be reading about Dr. Superiority. pathetic.

The funniest thing she said this week is in reference to going to work with our clients at another office. She asked another professional in her field who works with us 'are they working class people?' hmmm...i'm not quite sure what she thinks she is, but i would assume WORKING. So that makes me think: is she not a 'people' herself?

She is a bundle of nerves, always on edge, and constantly takes it out on us, particularly me. She thinks we have a bond and can relate. I have no clue why. She had a very minor surgery done, and upon her return (which was two weeks later-when i had it done, i did it thursday and returned monday!), she came in my office, locked and blocked the door and CRIED, literal tears, for over an HOUR about why i didn't call her or send a card.

Have i mentioned this woman is 52 years old? her three children have moved a minimum of 600 miles away from her. i can't believe they are still on this contenient.

I promise there will be more to come. more colorful and exciting. haha (please excuse my spelling...i'm very angry right now)."
01:16 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 25, 2004

>> Monsters

[ Work ]

BinThruit writes in this lil story about the fools in charge that don't want you to move ahead for their own good not yours...

"I have a list of them, but I think this one takes the cake....I was currently employed as an Office Manager at an Appraisal Firm...I was under a significant amount of stress due to the owner of the company not being around a lot because of his divorce, a staff that could never get to work & when they did they were incompetent. It was like being a kindergarten teacher, so I decided to take my appraisal courses & become an appraiser rather than managing a staff of children...When I told my boss I would be doing this, he told me he didn't want to take on another female appraiser full-time(shovanist) and that he wanted me to remain his manager...Long story short, I got another offer & now I am doing field work, however I go to find out after the fact, that he hired his 'FEMALE' x-wife to work there as an appraiser!...Dispicable....."
01:05 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 24, 2004

>> Scripted Stupidity

[ Work ]

Anonymous brings to light that those scripted questions are definitely dreamchilds of a fool...

"I work in in a department providing product support. I interface with vendors other companies that resell my companies products. I talk to the same vendors/companies/people every day. Some super genius in a corner office somewhere decided that we needed a 'guideline for vendor contacts.' Basically, a script that we are supposed to follow when speaking to the same people that I have talked to for going on 4 years.

The foolish thing is that at the end of each call, I am now required (as part of the script) to say is there anything else that I can assist you with? One day I didn't.

My supervisor who was monitoring (for quality assurance) asked me why I didn't ask, Is there anything else that I can assist you with. So I asked her, is 'active'listening supposed to be part of a quality contact.(we can be reprimanded for asking people to repeat information) She said, 'Yes.' So I asked if she was listening when the other party said, 'well thats all I need, thanks.' She said yes but that the question is mandatory."
01:11 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 23, 2004

>> My Stupid, Lazy, Fat Boss

[ Boss ]

PSMman writes about his Boss... you know the one that doesn't do shit... hell isn't that most bosses?

"I work at a plant in a very large poultry, etc. 'protein' corporation. My boss, the 'Refrigeration Superintendent' (?) is a 350 to 400 pound lazy, inconsiderate, CYA master that is incompetent beyond words.

Example: He walks into our small office many times a day and never closes the door back even part way. He has ignored most everything I ever tell/remind him to do. Everything gets thrown into his pile of crap and buried. I put serious documents that require his action/decision/proofing/approval/signature in the most blatantly obvious places in the office that I can, and he never looks at them. He won't take the initiative for most anything, preferring is to 'go away'. He has some mysterious way managed to slide out from under being fired for various offenses or incompetentcies half a dozen times. It's amazing. I can't tell you anything else. It's too ridiculous to believe. I live it everyday I'm at work.

AAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"
01:04 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 22, 2004

>> Don't spend your para-digms

[ Boss ]

Scornful Gearhead brings in a story after getting fired... and I commend you for the honesty...

"OK. First, I'm not there anymore. People don't like to hear the truth, and I got canned for it.

I am an engineer hired to help the company make their products easier to assemble. Tremendous success. So this company fires the guy in the orphan stepchild area of the plant and puts me in charge of cleaning it up. (Note, they fired the person before him, too - Danger, Will Robinson.)

The department has been ignored, with no resources given of any significance, and no design standardization. The designs are so riddled with mistakes it's terrifying. And they want me to do Lean Manufacturing.

Rule #1 about LM: It requires stability. The department was the classic swan swimming like hell underneath the water. Had been since the beginning.

Rule #2 about LM: It's an amplifier for anything wrong in your system. In this case, there was more wrong than right.

So, I go back to my boss, and the VP of Engineering, telling them that I need time to get things stable, and time to fix all the design bugs - because if I can take good part 'A' and good part 'B' and can't make a good assembly 'C' all of the time, you can't run a Lean department that way. I told them I need to fix the designs so that the problem goes away, forever.

I get told 'Ignore the design problems, just write a procedure to tell the people how to get around it.'"
01:12 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 21, 2004

>> My psycho boss

[ Boss ]

Wednesday Addams writes in about the boss with the ol migraine trick to get outta work... get them some aspirin and tell them to suck it up...

"I can write a book about my psycho boss, She is so high strung that she sometimes starts screaming and crying in the store in front of customers. She insisted on changing the computer software in december in the middle of christmas so none of us had any training on how to use it properly so while its the busiest time in the year it takes us twice as long to ring up customers. she interrupts us for something stupid even if the store is full of customers and we are busy as hell. She has to leave early almost every day because she gets a 'Migraine'"
01:02 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 20, 2004

>> Nepotism in it's purest form

[ Boss ]

free-flap brings some advice to those of you before post up family photos like this fool...

"I had a Female boss who wasn't that great. She had a bunch of family photos in her office that I looked at everyday. After there were several employee turnovers due to her we were in need of hiring other "qualified" people to help handle the workload in the dept. Well, one day this new employee was hired and to me he looked so very familiar. I couldn't peg where I saw him and it was driving me crazy - I thought it was a grocery store or similar. About the same time I noticed that my boss took down her prized family photos. Well - the same smarts ran in the family because as soon as the new employee felt comfortable in his new cube he started putting up his own family photos to make his place more comfy. It was so odd that he had one of the same family pictures that were in the boss's office. Get it? The boss hired her brother..As soon as I figured it out I was so floored because the director of the group had to also know that he was her brother since they were very friendly with each-other. Their secret didn't last that long, perhaps it may have if they would not have thought that the employees were dummies. Go figure, the secret soon got out and the brother was soon wasting his time looking for employment inside the company - like someone else would hire this guy who squirmed his way into the company. The boss was put on probation and thought that by her good behavior all would be forgotten. All was forgotten within about 6 months and then she was fired. The director didn't fare that well either. Lesson - don't put up family photos and then hire your family to work in your dept."
01:02 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 19, 2004

>> Management is like chess...isn't it?

[ Work ]

Climbing the Corporate Ladder shares the fact that we can all be bought... for a price... ;)

"According to a manager in my company, good management involves the finely-tuned skills of strategic planning and organization. He added that if I aspired to a management position, I should take every management and supervisory class I could fit into my schedule. He also said I should select a mentor from the organization, preferably one not in our chain of command. Lastly, he suggested I study Chess, a game of tactical logic, theory, and strategy. So I began with what I could first fit into my schedule. I studied Chess.

When I had mastered the game enough to win a few rounds against experienced players, I began to compare the strategy of Chess to that of the management practices at my firm.

Unfortunately, the decisions made in the IS department seemed more akin to the combined rules for playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey, while blindfolded, and winning the title of Homecoming Queen, rather than the tactics used to play Chess. In fact, the logic used in decision making hits the bulls eye as often as a drunken Dart player.

Now, anyone who has ever played or watched a game of Darts in a bar or pub KNOWS most players ARE under the influence of alcohol. And last week, much like a drunken Dart player, the manager of MY manager closed his eyes and threw a dart at the department's organizational chart. The dart landed on my name, and he decided to cross me off the Management Track.

My immediate manager was the MESSENGER. The way he explained it to me, 'You win some. You lose some.'

Although angry at first, I later sighed with relief. I realize that 'Management' is not a game I'm willing to play in this company. Not for a million bucks.

Well...maybe a million."
01:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 18, 2004

>> See the badge? It says 'Store Manager'...

[ Rant ]

Anonymous works for the guy I beat the crap out of in high school...

"At our store we have recently gotten a new manager that does nothing. With old managers, they would help out whenever needed, we are a smaller staffed store so everyone is usually needed for something. Our new manager refuses to help. One time when asked for a little help to ring in lines when they got long, he just pointed at his badge that says 'Store Manager' and said "See this? It means I don't have to do anything," and walked away. Until he arrived, our #1 concern was customers, and got compliments for going far beyond what we needed to do to keep them coming back to our low traffic store. He cusses infront of customers, and while not doing anything, says he's too busy to assist one of us who need a manager for a specific task. He doesn't realize that he has about 3/4 of the store ready to quit at any given moment."
01:10 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 17, 2004

>> Dumb & Dumber

[ Boss ]

Dumbfounded needed to get this off his chest about his fool ass bosses ...

"I work in the IT industry as a lowly paid programmer, in a company that is going under, due to a combination of factors including:

* Having a salesman as the CEO and associated positions;
* Having too many levels of management, where the managers think that the sun shines out of their arses;
* Company is only chasing big contracts, and ignoring the small contracts that have kept the company in business in the past. As a result, the company will be closing down the office that I work in, in the next six months or so.

Anyway, my story is about my direct team leader, and his boss.

Firstly let me start with my direct team leader. This is a person, who has about 10 years experience, and is getting paid big bucks as a contractor, and knows NOTHING! You ask him a simple question and he hasn't got a clue! His reply is 'Send me an e-mail'. As a result, I don't ask him any questions, and continue on.

This bloke is also very results orientated - every five minutes, he will ask one of us lowly paid programmers when will we finish the task that we are on. We then explain to him that we are waiting on information by others. So what do you think his next question is? 'So when will you be finished?'

Now for my direct team leader's boss. This is a person, who has about 15 years experience, and is also getting paid big bucks as a contractor, and also knows NOTHING!

At this company, he originally started as contract programmer three years ago. Then two years ago, he became the technical team leader (with no mentoring or management experience) on a big project that the company has. During the last two years this bloke has refused to accept blame for anything that has gone wrong with the project, as a direct result of the actions that he has taken. In addition to this, in meetings you cannot say one word contradicting him, as he palms off the criticism, or doesn't answer the questions raised. As a result this bloke has lost all credibility with the lowly paid programmers.

Now that the MD of the office has admitted that the office is closing down, the above mention people are expecting the lowly paid programmers to work long and hard to meet their deadlines!"
01:08 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 16, 2004

>> Superior vs. Supervisor Ethics

[ Boss ]

Anonymous brings the realities of business ethics the way only a fool can...

"At work, we had to all take this on-line training course on 'business ethics'. Y'now...good employees practice honesty, integrity, no cheating... So the boss writes to us and says the powers that be (i.e. the people whose butt he's up) have been tracking people taking the course and they complain people are doing the online course 'too quickly'. It looks like people are just flipping through the pages in a rush to get the damn thing done, without really trying to understand the course content. So boss's suggestion is this: start the course, go off and have a coffee, then come back later and finish the course. That way, his peoples 'metrics' will look good. He's so stupidly hypocritical that he doesn't even realize he gave everyone all the proof they'd ever need of his absence of ethics in his e-mailed suggestion."
01:18 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 15, 2004

>> Flip Flop or Sandal?

[ Boss ]

ReadMyLips has put this image in my head of these supervisors always with ears perched listening for the flip-flop sound...

"I work in a business office that has control freakin fools in charge. Although the dress code is not strict, for some reason the fools in charge decided to go ballistic about what constitutes a sandal. One of the employees wore white sandals one day that had a strap between her toes. A big, huge deal was made as to whether this was considered a flip flop or a sandal. One of the supervisors actually made her walk to see if it made a 'flip-flop' sound! This turned into a big meeting and the next day a memo was sent out to the entire company banning any type of shoes that went between the toes or made a 'flip-flop' sound. How ridiculous is this? You would think there would be more important things to do! What a bunch of freakin control freaks!"
01:17 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 14, 2004

>> Lock up the thermostat

[ Rant ]

Fed Up shares a hilarious story with a battle of fools over the thermostat... and enjoy the beer man... you might need more than just a six pack before work again...

"I work with many fools and have often thought of sending in a story; well, today's the day! I have the joy of spending my days in a dumpy little office condo with some real geniuses. The two women, both around 60, are constantly whining about the temperature. In the summer it's too hot and in the winter it's too hot. Today, I was watching the president of the company and his wife, whose offices are on opposite sides of the building, changing the temperature about every half hour. His office got too cold so he would turn it up, hers was too hot so she would turn it down. Meanwhile, the rest of us are bouncing from hypothermia to heatstroke and back again, these two are constantly changing the temperature. This afternoon the temperature got up to about 80 degrees, and the wife goes to turn the thermostat down, well it won't cool off fast enough so after about 30 seconds she turns on the air conditioning. Now, we are not in Miami here people, we're in Chicago where it was a steamy 22 degrees today. By the time I was through dealing with this and left the receptionist, the other one who is constantly overheated, is sitting at her desk wearing a fucking parka and gloves! Man am I glad I'm home, time for a beer."
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 13, 2004

>> "Work Characters"

[ Work ]

Wyz@ssChik put together a great list of fools at her job what about yours?

"I too, work with fools. For months I have been miserable at my job - not because I don't like the work - because I work with fools. Instead of allowing the insanity to envelop me, I laugh at their pathetic-ness. I created a doc on my computer called 'work characters'. Every time one of these ridiculous people behaves ridiculously, I document the character that they are. Here are some of the characters that I am forcibly surrounded by (anyone seem familiar?):

Stand up in his cubicle and yell into his telephone guy. Walk around the floor and talk loudly while on his cell phone guy. Can't listen to you if she's got a phone in her hand waiting for other party to answer chick.All I talk about is food guy. Pen clicking guy. Uses clichés that sound ridiculously stupid guy. I don't know which printer I printed to guy. I dress like I'm going to a club chick (even though we work in Corporate) . Bad attitude stupid lazy chick. I'll spend all day figuring out how to pawn my work off on you guy.I don't know how the heck to back up my files guy - and I can't even follow the step by step idiot proof instructions that you provided to me. I have to announce everything out loud as I stand up and go to do whatever it is I am announcing guy (like anyone cares). I don't want to think about it boss guy, you handle it - but I still want to micromanage it.I stole your white out guy. I listen to my voice mails on speakerphone at the loudest possible volume chick. I constantly stand by your cubicle and talk about sports guy. I have to interrupt you 5x a day to say 'hi' guy. Dumb guy who uses big words to try to sound smart. Mr. Validate me guy - validate me validate me validate me. Sings to himself, but out loud, guy. Walks around most of the day not doing work and has the ballz to ask you to show him how to customize his computer guy. Tells jokes that are never funny guy. Cannot make eye contact with him guy - because if you do he will start to talk to you about nonsense. His cell phone makes cool noises so he walks around feeling cool guy.Stinky food eating guy. Scavenger food guy - always asks you for some of whatever you've got even though there's available food floors away. Pansy guy (the French guy) can't communicate can't figure anything out and is a total baby if you don't offer your help. in fact, has the nuts to go to your superior to tell him to tell you to help him. Psychotic chick that flips off the handle over a cabinet being locked. The 'all about me' chick.

That's my list so far. anyone else got additions!???"
01:07 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 12, 2004

>> From manager to janitor

[ Boss ]

Anonymous reminds you to avoid having your feet touch the ground if you work for this fool...

"This happened to me about 5 months ago, during one of the few rainstorms we had this past summer. I had walked my dog right before work, and managed to get some mud on one of my shoes while curbing him. I get into work, and at about 10 a.m. attend a meeting in one of our conference rooms. During the meeting, I notice our leader staring at the floor. He stops the meeting to pick up a piece of mud. He then proceeds to ask to look at everyone's shoes. Of course, this came from me, and I apologized saying I hadn't noticed it on my shoes. This, of course, was nowhere good enough. I had to leave the meeting to walk around the office picking up all the pieces of dirt and mud on the floor (apparently this was much to big of an issue to wait until the cleaning crew could vacuum it up that night). I didn't get a broom and dustpan or anything like that, I had to bend over and pick up each pinhead-sized clump of dirt by hand. After doing this, I decided I better wash my shoes off, which I did as best I could. After returning to the meeting I got another inspection of my shoes, whereupon I was told they were still too dirty. I was told to go home to change into a flat-bottomed shoe with no tread. And the trip home to change shoes counted as my lunch break for the day. The icing on the cake was being told by the same boss that my presentation at the meeting was terrible - I hadn't been there to present because I was sent home, and someone else had to fill in for me and understandably didn't know much about what they were presenting on."
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 11, 2004

>> Getting cussed out for no reason

[ Work ]

rebekah writes about yet another problem we gotta deal with during this recession... staying at a job with fools...

"I have been employed by this co. for a little over a year. I took the job for convenience and good benefits. I am actually 'over qualified' when it comes down to it.
Anyways, at first my supervisor was really cool and complimented me all the time. After a few months I started to question certain things and was verbal about my concerns.

I have since been blamed for other co-worker's mistakes. I found the evidence and turned it in to my supervisor. It was not acknowledged at all. My boss will walk out into the office and cuss anyone whom he pleases. And I mean full verbal brandishing before he even knows the full story. When you present him with the circumstances - he doesn't give a crap. He will never admit that he is wrong.

Obviously I'd love to walk out on him, but as I stated earlier the benefits are great and the job market is not looking good where I live. I feel stuck and I think he knows it."
01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 10, 2004

>> How Much for the Return Trip?

[ Work ]

bussedoff has one of those moments you wish you could curse off your fool boss...

"I work for a company that is experiencing growing pains, adding staff while the physical building remains that same. They recently added a double wide trailer to house some of the employees, but now do not have sufficient parking.

The moronic higher-ups came up with a solution: they would use an un-paved, unused lot about 2 miles away from the company to address the parking problem. They would then lease a rickety old school bus and have people shuttled in to work and back at the end of the work day.

When they presented the idea to us, they asked for volunteers to park at the remote, unsecured, unlit lot. No one accepted. Finally, when one employee asked, "What is my incentive to do this"?, an overweight VP replied, "YOUR JOB!" in front of a few hundred others.

Talk about positive motivation!!"
01:16 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 09, 2004

>> Full of herself

[ Boss ]

Anonymous writes in about someone I swear I have worked with at one point in my job career... but alas they were not in PR... regardless full of themselves is a common issue amongst fools...

"I worked for an incredibly self-absorbed woman who ran a PR agency in Miami. I honestly think she started the company so she would have an audience to whom to show off her vast wardrobe. A complete fashion victim, she would wear clothes that were often unsuitable for her age and a professional environment...I remember one lime green cashmere tube top that revealed sun-damaged shoulders. We were forced to sit through interminable weekly meetings which she would preside over perched on her chair with one leg propped beneath her and chewing gum smacking in her mouth. The wall directly across from her was mirrored and she would stare at herself in it while listening to others talk. She would play with her hair, examine her shoes, twist in her chair to view herself from different angles and apply lipstick.

The only thing that would break her trance would be when her machine audibly indictated that an e-mail had come in. She'd interrupt whoever was speaking to read the e-mail aloud and then the whole office would have to wait while she replied to the message with assistance from senior execs. Each word was painstakingly chosen and then read over several times before the message could be sent. "Okay, where were we?" she'd ask and then resume the meeting. We would stare at one another in disbelief, but it never even ocurred to her how ridiculous she was."
01:07 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 08, 2004

>> Stupid Foolish Coworkers

[ Fools ]

FoolMagnet has a classic story of enjoying work but finding working with a fool ex-friend coworker irritating...

"There are 8 women in my office all are okay to work with but two of them. One is a lazy slacker. She's been there 5yrs...makes a lot of mistakes...and dumps as much work as possible on every one else. (puts her phone on break or doesn't answer it etc..) I have complained about her a few times when she was rude or pushy with me, or spending hours on the phone surfing the web while many of the rest of us worked. She of course doesn't like me now, and proceeds to gossip about me around the office. Not fun..but I've put up w/the bs. The second one is worse...this one I knew from a few years ago(Our kids used to be friends)but her girl started having trouble in school. (skipping, failing etc) She pulled her out and is homeschooling her now. Anyhow her lovely kid goes to the Highschool where mine goes to use the library occasionally. She apparently accused my daughter of throwing gum at her last week. Petty...not worth mentioning to me. But this woman proceeded to send me emails...not very nice ones either complaining about it. I found it upsetting and uncomfortable at best. She also accused me of something a few months back that I didn't do and I got called in to HR over it. I told them she doesn't like me because of our kids differences. They said DO NOT bring the kids stuff to work, and she did. Now, If I go to HR she MAY get written up. But, because I doubt they'd fire her, I'd just end up having to work with her and end up dealing with more office politics. It seems she and the office 'slacker' have recently bonded. They go on break together several times a week.

I love my job as the work goes...but I just HATE office politics and don't want to play with them!!! I feel I am being forced to leave. It sucks."
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 07, 2004

>> Fools at the Top

[ Boss ]

morons and fools everywhere! lets us know the real truth of what fools are doing to prevent projects to run smoothly...

"I have just completed a Masters of Science in Information Technology, specializing in Project Management. My job is to get the executives to plan projects in information technology so that the project managers and the technical people can implement to project. Of course, there are no project managers or technical people on the planning committees and I have never seen an executive speak with the technical people. This means the executives are planning our something that maybe the project managers and technical people know they can not implement.

Of course in the middle of this, between the strategyic and the operational people are alot of managers that have no sense of team building. They all want to be superman and get the next (Pick ONE OR MORE:) 1. Raise, 2. Promotion, 3. Bonus, 4. Get their competition fired. This middle layer causes the strategic plan to become a tactical nightmare. The middle managers are NOT team players.

Managers and executives are not paying attention to what they are actually measuring. Much less what they are trying to accomplish. And of course, you couldn't tell them that this doesn't make any sense. They are above that.

Enron, Xerox, Tyco, and many other companies are so secretive about what the executives are doing that no one in the company knows what the strategy is and if the ship is running well or not.

Honestly and Integrity just doesn't exist much in America any longer. Just smile and say everything is going well. It allows the morons and idiots to proliferate!!!

Hope I haven't depressed anyone more than they are already!!!

They are now planning the projects for next year that you will not be able to implement. So much for supply chain management at the American Auto Companies. Another Industry that we can ship abroad is being destroyed because of the executives lack of true knowledge."
01:13 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 06, 2004

>> Boss poops his pants

[ Boss ]

T-Watts writes a story I gotta admit he was a fool for yellin out loud but oh boy was it worth it... I can only imagine the horror...

"I was finishing the annual report last year when my boss ran by my office and practically dove into the bathroom. At this time, he had the attention of everyone working, so we huddled around the bathroom door. We heard him groaning and obviously in pain, so I went in there to see if he was alright. As I saw him cleaning out his drawers, I ran out of the bathroom laughing and yelling "he pooped his pants!" I didn't work there much longer."
01:15 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 05, 2004

>> Mixed Metaphors

[ Boss ]

Paddy shares a collection of mixed metaphors from a fool boss that has obviously no clue!

"My boss is constantly using mixed metaphors in our company meetings ... which make me almost keel over. Some samples below:

"I'll deal with that road when we cross it."

"We're cooking on all cylinders now."

"Don't act like the entire floor is falling out!"

"He found himself where he wasn't at."

"I'm in a roll right now."

"Number than a pounded hake."

"It's a pretty open and dry case."

"Right in the dead of Summer ..."

Anybody have anything similar?"
01:19 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 04, 2004

>> What about my kids?

[ Other ]

Anonymous shares a story about his friends dealings with a foolish mother... this must be why there are so many lawsuits...

"I had a friend who worked at McDonald's who told me this story. One day there was a blackout in our town and the local McDonald's was basically offline as it takes electricity to heat all that greasy oil. Some lady called in and asked whether the McDonald's would be open. Fair enough. When my friend responded with a "No", the lady asked in an indignant tone "Well, what am I supposed to feed my kids?" Too bad I wasn't there. I would have suggested chemical castration tablets."
01:10 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 03, 2004

>> Absolutley insane

[ Rant ]

P'Oed just needs to vent a little about fools bugging him...

"I work for a mental retardation center, in the food service department. It seems that that management has a thing against me. There's 2 bosses that have their foolish way of running this place: female and male boss. Female boss has a way to make me look completely bad. An example, I was called in the office for something that happened over the weekend. It seems I forgot to deliver some meals and her kissass buddy had to pinch in early to deliver it. I told her it was an honest mistake, but I got written up for it. That aint right. Then theres male boss. He has some sort of split personality, where hes calm and funny one minute and a raging angry freak the next. Him and me have our issues and it seems I'm the target of his verbal barbs. He also has a tendency to make everyone look bad by yelling like a maniac, and he makes himself look bad. I'm giving these shmoes one month and I'm getting a better job. Oh one more thing, the kissass buddy. He comes in at about an hour forty five minutes before hes supposed to punch in, what is up with that? And almost everybody kisses his worthless ass, except me."
01:10 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 02, 2004

>> Foolish Enough to Put Abuse In Writing

[ Boss ]

Victimized finds that having a fool boss that is jealous is a terrible combo...

"Boss has this professional jealousy thing going. I get along with my customers really well, but he/she definitely doesn't. My customers tell me I provide excellent customer support, but my boss has this vision for doing things 'better' (i.e.pet project that somehow the fools above him/her have been coerced to believe in, but which go against the customers).

Rather than maintaining or even enhancing the current successful arrangement, he/she actively works to make it fail, so that his/her new paradigm can 'fix all the problems'. and save the day...and get funded of course.

Typical politics for new projects: work on something new on the sly by borrowing from other projects already under way, and when it's bsically in the bag, only then apply for gobs of project money to make the 'new idea' happen, then unveil 'solution' (Ta-Daaa!) on time and on budget, while really spending the project money on something else no one needs.

Typical employee relations: stop communicating if employee doesn't co-operate, and doesn't tow party line (i.e. won't always say yes). Doesn't matter if they are great employees to everyone else but the boss. boss will mess 'em up and drive 'em out if they are too good, too influential. Hell, even abuse subordinates in writing. How? Get the especially-far-up-ass good-for-nothing subordinates to 'complain' so there's some dirt the boss can use for 'leverage' against you at bonus time. Reveal the dirt only after eight months have passed, so even petty little problems can be safely blown up into festering performance issues (which, strangely, the boss is never held accountable for because of lack of supervision and poor communication!).

If you try to use or promote common sense, or best practices from elsewhere (such as training courses you have been sent on), you are 'idealistic'. 'This is X Corp.! You know we do things different here! Get used to it!'

Yeah, sure boss."
01:12 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

January 01, 2004

>> What do you want? Leave or NOT?

[ Boss ]

I am making this a bonus for New Years Day... since one of the days doubled up...

Anonymous writes in about a damn fool boss who obviously has a split personality...

"I have a new manager. We are salaried employees but clock in and out every day. We are paid overtime for every hour over 40. On the way out every day I get chastised for "leaving so soon" even though it is 15 - 20 minutes after my scheduled end time. In one on one meetings the importance of extra time and dedication is stressed and how importat it is to be there early (which I always am) and stay bit longer. Every two weeks when time sheets are submitted, we are reprimanded for "all this overtime" we have accumulated and our manager will wonder aloud "why can't you people get your work done in 40 hours every week". Screw him. With a shoe. What a fool."
02:09 AM - Posted by Disgruntled

>> Happy New Year

[ Rant ]

Today there is a day of rest from the fools of the world and just pray that the new year gets better... sadly we all know that the fools will still be there... so do you best to cope with them this year!
12:01 AM - Posted by Disgruntled